kbug

My boys...

2010-08-03T20:11:00.000-07:00

Well, actually, I should say my "newest" boys..... :) Liam was born on June 24th with a headful of dark hair like his mother. In this picture, taken when Liam was just a few days old, Sawyer was still trying to figure out who that baby was. He now calls him Iam and knows that he is his little brother. They are both wonderful beyond any words..... :)

Life has been so very busy lately.....

2010-05-11T00:41:00.000-07:00

......so where do I begin to tell you about it?

Sawyer is wonderful..........I have so enjoyed having him nearby since Seth got out of the Army and they moved back to town. I kept him one Friday night and took him to visit my dad and sisters. My little sister got out the dominoes for him to play with and we started lining them up to do the domino effect. He didn't have a clue what we were doing, so he just knocked them down. Finally, I put my arm out in front of him and said "wait." He looked so sad and walked away and put his head down on the stereo speaker and just kind of whimpered like his heart was broken. Susie and I continued to set up the dominoes in a long snakey path and, all of a sudden, he came running over to try to knock them down again. I put my arm out again and said "wait" and he went back to the speaker and put his head down again and sounded broken hearted again. This went on several times until we finally finished lining them up. Then I let him push them over. He thought it was wonderful, so we started setting them up again...and he did the same thing again with the trying to knock them down, broken-hearted, lay-his-head down on the speaker thing again. If I didn't stop him, he'd stop on his own and go back and put his head on the speaker. It had become part of the game. We were rolling with laughter by then. He was quite the entertainment that night. I wish I'd gotten a video of the whole thing..... :) Anyway, he makes my day, evening, night.....well, he makes my everything!!!

There's another one on the way..........Sawyer will have a little brother in June. It was quite unexpected...especially so soon and while Seth is still looking for that elusive police job...but I'm soooo very excited. I know Seth and Katie were both hoping for a girl this time, just like I was with my 3rd pregnancy, but I don't think they mind it too much. I know I wouldn't have known what to do with a girl..... :)

The boys moved to a bigger house..........since Seth and Katie and Sawyer moved in with the brothers, the house suddenly became very small. It only had 3 bedrooms, so Sawyer had been sleeping in Seth and Katie's room since the middle of September. There was just one living area, too, so they were on top of each other all the time...just no space for that many people...especially with all of Sawyer's toys. So, when the lease was up, they found a 4 bedroom with a living room and a seperate family room and dining area, so there's alot more room to spread out. They also have a very nice backyard with a covered deck, so they spend much more time outdoors now...and Sawyer loves that..... :)

It's traveling season again..........it started in February and will probably last all summer as I traipse off to various aggregates quarries across the country. Yep, that's what I do for a living folks. I've already been to Cincinnati for a conference; to northern Kentucky to tour an underground quarry (I took the picture below while in the underground quarry...it's a drill rig drilling holes for the next blast); to an operation in Brideport, Texas; and one south of Seattle. Next stop will be Atlanta, Georgia, for a press event and quarry visit, then I'll spend the weekend in South Carolina with an old childhood friend that I haven't seen in many moons. I'm looking forward to catching up with her and meeting her family. Can you believe it?? She found me on Facebook..... lol.

Well, I hope this catches everyone up on what's been going on in my life...and why I have been away for so long. Life just keeps getting better and busier all the time...which is fine by me..... :D

"Don't Tread on Me"

2009-11-11T06:46:00.000-08:00

That motto has been a part of American history, and on one of our first flags, since the very beginnings of our nation, and rightfully so, especially when you talk about our vets. Much has been said about the vet who returns from war and has trouble adjusting to home again. It's not a new subject to me...I've heard about it from many of the vets I know. A friend still has trouble dealing with some things after his year in Iraq. My dad has often talked about his return from more than 2 years of fighting the Japanese in the Pacific during WWII...and about the war he continued to fight in his dreams for many years after that. He adjusted, but not without scaring himself and my mother and the neighbors a few times.

My son seems to have made the transition pretty well after his two deployments, but he is not quite the same person he was when he left the first time...there's something different about him, but I can't quite say what it is. His transition to civilian life has gone okay, but the job hunt has not been easy. Finding a job to support his growing family has proven to be difficult. The other day he and his family were visiting. He had just lost a job that barely got them by while living with his brothers and had missed out on another good job opportunity, and he was approaching his 6-month re-enlistment window where he could go back in without having to repeat basic training. With no job on the horizon, his wife asked him if he would consider talking to a recruiter to see what his re-enlistment options were. His demeanor changed, his face darkened, and he answered with an emphatic "NO!" He went on to say that re-enlisting would mean another deployment and that he'd already been there twice and come back twice, but he had a gut feeling that if he went again, he wouldn't come back. Needless to say, that was the end of the conversation. I had never seen him look quite like that before...it was an eye-opener. He is still haunted by his time in Iraq. He's extremely proud of having served his country, but he wants a regular life now where he can watch his children grow up...and who can blame him.

Anyway, tread lightly and with great reverence when you encounter our vets...from any war. They have seen things and done things that the rest of us can't even imagine. Some want to talk about it, some don't...but they all deserve our utmost respect and appreciation.

A birthday party...

2009-09-24T20:07:00.000-07:00

Thought I should share this photo with all of you.....Sawyer celebrated his first birthday last Saturday. Here he is eating his cake...and wearing it, too..... lol. He loved it and was doing some two-fisted eating, as you can see. He got so many new toys at the party that he doesn't know which one to play with. Katie says she's going to rotate them one at a time..... hahaha.

He's growing up so fast...and is on the verge of walking any time now. His daddy and my other two boys were all walking by the time they were a year old, but Sawyer is taking his time. Right now, he crawls over to the couch or coffee table or wall or chair or whatever and pulls up and walks holding onto it. But he will walk by himself in his own good time..... :) All I know is he melts my heart and is pure joy!!!

A friend's book...

2009-08-17T10:45:00.000-07:00

My friend, Fred Minnick, spent 2004 in Iraq as a U.S. Army journalist. He was based in Mosul, though he traveled around the country to cover military missions and events. We kept in touch by e-mail during his year-long deployment, and he wrote a blog, In Iraq for 365, using the name Sminklemeyer that I read everyday. Some of you will know him as Desert Smink. His was the first military blog I ever read, and it had me hooked from the start. I checked his blog constantly for new posts . . . some had me rolling with laughter, others brought me to tears. I told him that he could paint a picture with his words . . . a picture that was vivid and made me feel like I was there and that I knew the people he wrote about. I, along with everyone else who followed his blog, encouraged him to write a book when he returned home.

Well, that book, Camera Boy: An Army Journalist's War in Iraq, is finally being published, and it's a good one. How do I know? I got a sneak peek . . . . . :) Anyway, his book will be available in November and can be pre-ordered at http://hellgatepress.com/display_book.php?id=84.

How I'm spending my summer...

2009-08-03T19:30:00.000-07:00

Need I say more?!?!?! Life has never been so sweet..... :)

My cell phone rang tonight...

2009-05-21T19:37:00.000-07:00

...and I saw a name on the caller ID that I hadn't seen in a long time.....Seth. Yep, my baby boy is home...and it feels great!! I don't yet know if I'll get to see him this weekend, but he's back, and that's all that matters..... :) What a wonderful gift just in time for Memorial Day!!

Welcome home, Seth!!

Thank you, Lord!!!

When Sawyer smiles...

2009-05-04T16:34:00.000-07:00

...all is right with the world..... :)

Sawyer and Katie have gone home now. I drove down to Hood with her on Friday and helped her "find" her house and yard after being in Dallas for a couple of months...which was longer than she had planned...but she enjoyed being here and we loved having them here. Waking up in the morning took on special meaning while they were here...nothing says good morning better than Sawyer's smile...it's contagious..... :)

This morning, I thought I heard him playing with one of his toys in his crib and a smile crept across my face, until I remembered that he was no longer here.....*sigh*. A few minutes later, like she had read my mind, Katie called and Sawyer told me good morning, which sounds alot like mmmmmbuh, but it was a sweet song to my ears..... :)

After Seth gets home, which will be soon, they will come up for a long 4-day weekend...I'll get to hug my baby boy whom I have greatly missed and see his baby boy's smile once more...ain't life sweet!!!

Can you see this, mom?

2009-03-30T10:42:00.000-07:00

Can you see this little great grandson of yours? Do you see me when I hold him . . . how much I love him and enjoy him? All the times I watched you hold my babies, all the times I saw that smile on your face and heard you humming to yourself as you rocked them . . . that all plays over and over again in my mind now. I was thinking of you just now as I rocked Sawyer to sleep. I thought as time went on, I would begin to miss you less, but I just seem to miss you more and more each day, especially now that I've become a grandmother. I wish you were here to hold this little guy. I know how much you would love to be able to do that. I can just picture the smile that would be on your face and hear you humming with contentment. I know you look down on us from Heaven and must be smiling . . . but I wish you were here. This is how I picture you still . . . holding one of my babies . . . . . :)

Spring . . . and new beginnings

2009-03-18T08:50:00.000-07:00

Oh my, so much has happened since my last post. It's spring here in Texas and new beginnings are in the air.

My hubby is now permanently employed at the temporary light-duty job he started when he returned to work after his neck surgery last year . . . granted, he had to take an 8% reduction in pay to do it. It's hard to believe it has been almost a year since his surgery. Time has just flown by. We were really sweating his job in January when his light duty ran out. We didn't know if he'd be able to get the job on a permanent basis or not, and the doc made it clear that he couldn't return to being a mechanic, but we knew we couldn't do without his paycheck. He did end up going a couple of weeks without any pay while the big guys worked out the details, though . . . and that happened at the same time I found out everyone at my company would have to take a 5% pay cut so no one would get laid off. You might think that I'd be upset about this, but actually, I'm extremely thankful. We are both working (even if it is for a bit less), I'm working at home and he's working two blocks away so we save money on gas (and we just found out that because neither of us "drives" to work now, our car insurance went down . . . bonus), we transferred our health insurance to my company and saved a ton of money (whoever said municipalities have better coverage is crazy), our 401Ks have taken a beating but we're investing like crazy now that prices are low hoping that there's nowhere for them to go but up, our family is healthy, my middle son finally landed a full-time job and begins work tomorrow, my baby boy will be returning from the sand in a few months, and his beautiful blue-eyed baby boy is asleep in the next room (working at home has its perks when it comes to grandbabies). I have no complaints . . . life is sweet . . . . . :)

Here's Sawyer after waking up from his nap today. He loves to sit at the edge of the crib and play peek a boo around the rails. He will be 6 months old tomorrow . . . . . :)

Thank you, Lord, for helping me see all the wonderful blessings in my life even during tough times . . . and help me continue to see them every day. Blessings on all of you, my friends . . . . . :)

Just call me Grambug.....

2008-12-27T06:34:00.000-08:00

My...it has been an incredibly long time since my last post...but life has been incredibly busy. What can I say...here I sit at my computer, typing with one hand because I'm holding Sawyer with the other. He is such a happy baby...he talks and coos and smiles...and he's such a snugglebug. Life is sweet!!! Just call me Grambug..... :)

Here's the picture that I sent to friends in my Christmas cards...Merry Christmas, everyone!!!

Another Veterans Day

2008-11-11T06:11:00.000-08:00

Here I sit, on yet another Veterans Day, thinking about all the vets in my life. Family and friends...all very special to me.

I think about a friend who served a year in Iraq back in 2004, who saw things that still haunt him to this day.

I think about my two uncles who served during WWII...one who flew B-17 bombing missions over Germany and spent 18 months as a prisoner of war after his plane blew up in mid-air, and one who joined Patton's army in their march across Europe and into Germany so he could find his brother in that POW camp. They, like so many other WWII vets, are no longer with us.

I think about my dad who fought the Japanese during WWII on three different islands in the Pacific...slogging through the swamps of Bougainville, surviving a horrifying bonzai on Guam, and being wounded on Iwo Jima. After the war, he continued to fight the enemy for years in his dreams.

I think about my middle son who helped launch the first strike of B-52 bombers from Barksdale Air Force Base after the World Trade Center attacks on September 11, 2001. He said it was one of the proudest moments of his life as he watched all of them lift into the air...and one of the saddest as he wished he was going with them.

I think about my youngest boy who is currently serving his second tour of duty in Iraq. He has seen things that he won't talk to me about, which worries me, but he has adjusted well and put them behind him so he can move on.

So many vets to be proud of. My dad always says they aren't heroes, they're just doing their jobs. In light of that, all I can say is......job well done! But they'll always be heroes to me..... :)

Here . . . and gone again

2008-10-20T10:44:00.001-07:00

With all the excitement of the new baby, and just being busy, I never posted anything about Seth coming home for R&R. He arrived home on Monday, September 29th and was flying to Hood, of course, but he had a short layover in Dallas, so Kevin and I went out to meet him. I offered to buy him some lunch and where did he say he wanted to go? McDonalds . . . with a big grin on his face. I knew he'd been in the sandbox for nearly 4 months, but come on now . . . . . ugh! It was a short visit because he only had a couple hours between flights, but it was sooooo good to see his face. He was really anxious to see Katie . . . and to get to meet his brand-new baby boy face to face.

We went down to Hood the next weekend. Seth had requested Thanksgiving dinner while he was home, since he was going to miss the real one, and Katie went all out. She borrowed a turkey fryer from a friend to fry the turkey and boy, was it good. And we had all the fixin's too . . . giblet gravy, dressing, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, sweet potatoes (I've never cared for them before, but Katie's were really good), deviled eggs (the boys love 'em), rolls, and chocolate pie and pumpkin pie for dessert. Mmmmm!!! We stuffed ourselves . . . . . :)

Katie, Seth, and Sawyer came to Dallas the next Tuesday to catch up with the rest of the family and friends. We had a burger bash on Saturday and invited everybody. It was fun and the food was good. And everyone who hadn't had a chance to meet Sawyer yet got the chance . . . and of course, they got to see Seth and Katie, too.

They headed back to Hood that Sunday afternoon and spent the next week just doing things together as a family. They had some great pictures taken, too. Is he not just the most beautiful baby you've ever seen??? Okay, I admit it, I'm a bit prejudiced . . . . . :)

They took some family pictures, too. This one isn't my favorite, but it's a good one. I have yet to get my favorite from her . . . maybe when she comes in next month . . . . . :)

Then, these two are just too wonderful for words . . . . . :)

Last Saturday, however, his R&R came to an end. Katie and Sawyer said goodbye to Seth at the airport in Killeen, and it was really hard for Katie. She told me that Seth held Sawyer at the airport and kissed him and told him that he was going to miss him. She cried on the way home, and I cried when I saw this picture.

Seth had another layover in Dallas, so we went out and spent a little time with him while he waited for his plane . . . along with all the other troops awaiting a return to the sandbox. We ate at McDonalds again . . . ugh. I was going to give him a pocket angel, but he pulled out his wallet and showed me that he still had the pocket angel and St. George medallion I gave him the last time he was deployed. That made me smile. I gave him one last hug as he prepared to board and watched him until he was out of sight. It will be a very, very long time before we see him again . . . and where he's going, they only have internet on one shared computer, so we may not hear from him much either. That will be especially hard for Katie . . . she wants so much for him to be able to see his son as he grows . . . . . *sigh.*

Lord, I commend Seth into your care and safekeeping . . .

Here they are . . .

2008-09-28T20:15:00.000-07:00

Here are a few more pics we took when Sawyer was born . . . here he is taking a first look at the new world around him . . .

Here's the proud mom . . . and she certainly has someone to be very proud of . . . . . :)

I love to watch Katie with Sawyer . . . she's such a sweet, loving mother . . . . . :)

Here he is ready to go home from the hospital, but he can't wait to meet his daddy at the airport when he comes home for R&R . . . soon, Sawyer . . . very soon . . . . . :)

I miss him . . . it's only been a week since I held him, but it seems like forever . . . . . :)

He's here!!!!!!!

2008-09-22T19:41:00.000-07:00

Meet Sawyer Allen, born at Fort Hood on Friday, September 19 at 11:04 am . . . 8 pounds, 7 1/2 ounces and 20 inches long. He is absolutely perfect!!! Need I say more??

More pictures coming soon . . . . . :)

Just working and waiting...

2008-09-10T12:24:00.000-07:00

It has been a long, busy month since I last posted here. Katie is less than 2 weeks from the hopeful domino now and Seth is a month closer to coming home for R&R. Those are the most important things that have taken place during the month...as you can imagine, I'm counting the days. I spent last weekend with Katie, helping her clean up and rearrange her basement. We had a very nice visit and even got to talk to Seth on the IM. Her grandparents came in to stay nearby her this last month...and it really makes me feel better to know that they are only a few minutes away from her. I know she has some good friends there, but...it just makes me feel better knowing she has some family nearby. I'm only 2 1/2 hours away, but it can be an extremely long drive when you're in a hurry...and I will be..... :) The people at the visitors center gave me an extended 1-month pass so I can get on base without having to wait in the temporary pass line when I explained that the father-to-be was deployed...thank you, thank you, thank you. I have waited for 45 minutes before to get a pass, as some of you out there may know from experience.

Another milestone during the past month is that the boys' old room looks like a guest room...it actually looks better than my bedroom..... :) I still need to paint the doors and part of the windows, but it looks great. I should take a picture and post it...well, maybe later. And my office is coming right along, too. I will finish up painting the doors and window and begin moving in furniture this week...thank goodness for grown sons when it comes to moving furniture...I would be lost without them...and they know it..... :)

Well, that's all the time I have right now...and hopefully, the next post will be exclaiming the birth of my first grandson...I'll keep you posted..... :)

Sore muscles and memories...

2008-08-05T19:45:00.000-07:00

Working in the boys' old room has proven to be quite an adventure. I feel like I've been on some kind of Indiana Jones expedition. I have all kinds of bumps, bruises, and scrapes on my knuckles and ankles from moving furniture, scraping walls, taking down shelves, and toting ladders. All the muscles that have sat dormant for the last few years are now screaming at me, as is my lower back . . . all from carrying heavy items, squatting, getting up and down, and bending the wrong way. Excedrin is my friend!!

But . . . I've also found all kinds of treasures. The bookshelf had to be emptied of all the old childrens books, and I couldn't help but pause as I took each one down. There were so many, and I could remember reading every single one of them to the boys . . . some so often that the pages were bent and torn.

Then came their baby books. I couldn't help but smile as I turned the pages of each one, it was like being there again. I found old pictures I'd forgotten about. Of course, I had to read through each book to look once again at all their firsts . . . so many wonderful memories. I couldn't help but feel rather sad, though, as I thought of how Seth will miss so many of Sawyer's firsts.

The armoire was next, and it was full of Kevin's military stuff . . . old uniforms, a hard hat and reflective belt from working on the flight line, overalls for keeping his uniform clean, training manuals, certificates of achievement, and commendation medals. The Air Force was his life for over 9 years. I found the snorkeling gear he bought when he went TDY to Guam one year . . . you should have seen his eyes light up when I gave it to him. He still talks about Guam and would like to go back again. When he was there, he tried to get his grandfather one of the commemorative coins that the Guam government gave out at their 50-year celebration to honor the Marines who liberated them from the Japanese during WWII . . . his grandfather, my dad, just happens to be one of those Marines . . . but there were no coins to be found. Dad was set to go to that celebration in 1994, but was unable to make the trip when my mother was diagnosed with cancer. Anyway, Kevin brought his grandfather some items from the museum that was built where the Marines landed back in 1944.

The armoire also held a bunch of Seth's stuff . . . old civies that no longer fit him, wet suits he wore to wakeboard when the lake water was a bit chilly, boot casts he wore when he broke his foot as a teenager . . . twice, and, of course, his "chrome dome." The chrome dome is a shiny silver helmet that he wore when he played roller hockey. During a tournament one year, he scored a goal and then did a backwards roll and came right back up on his feet . . . it was the coolest thing . . . and completely accidental.

The cubby holes held yet more treasures . . . Seth's old wallet full of highschool IDs, a grand prix ID, old work IDs, old insurance cards, and his first drivers license with a picture of him when he was just 16. It also held an Army ID card that he got for doing a simulator at an air show at Barksdale Air Force Base where Kevin was based when Seth was still in highschool . . . a sign of things to come?? I also found a picture of Kevin with a huge smile on his face that was taken when he and a friend went camping the summer after graduation, right before he left for basic training. That picture is now on my refrigerator.

The closet has yet to be emptied, but it doesn't have to be in order to finish the room . . . thank goodness. It's full of paintball guns and equipment, at least a dozen hockey sticks, a couple of tote boxes full of boy stuff, Kevin's Garth Brooks-style cowboy hat from way back, and Rick's baseball bag that holds all the bats, balls, and gloves . . . except for Ken's grandfather's glove, Ken's old glove and cleats from his little league days, and Seth's lefty glove, all of which have gone to Fort Hood to decorate the nursery.

So many wonderful memories!!! Some of these treasures will, without a doubt, find their way back into the guest room when it is finished . . . I'm not quite sure how or where, but they will be there. Some things are just too precious to let go of . . . . . :)

I found the the bottom of the black hole...

2008-07-29T20:11:00.000-07:00

I didn't think it was possible, but I found the bottom of the black hole...a.k.a. the room Kevin and Seth shared growing up. Yep, two boys in one room...and they both survived. I admit that there were days when I thought they would kill each other, but you wouldn't know it now. They're as close as two brothers can be. Who says kids need their own individual rooms growing up? I shared a room with both my sisters. We had a triple bunkbed...and yes, they really do make them..... :)

Anyway, their old room is completely empty now, which I didn't think was possible. Albeit, we have a guest room (Rick's old room) that a guest could not stay in at the moment because of all the stuff piled up in there; there's an old desk behind the table in the kitchen with stuff piled on top of it; and a large armoir is now in our hallway making passage almost impossible without turning sideways. But hey, it's temporary, and when you have a really small house, you learn to get creative when shuffling furniture around when it's necessary..... :)

So, my friends, the room makeover has begun...it's about freaking time, too. I will turn the black hole into our guest room (after some major patching, texturing, painting, and boy funk removal), and turn what is now the guest room into my office (after a bit of touch-up painting). And this all has to be done within the next month and a half or I'll be working out of the nearest wi-fi joint come October..... :)

Prayers......many prayers..... :)

True patriots

2008-06-29T08:21:00.000-07:00

The first time Seth deployed, I wrote about the Maine Troop Greeters here. I was really impressed with their commitment to our troops. Well, he flew through Maine this time, too, and was, once again, greeted by those wonderful people. Not only do they do what they can to make the troops feel appreciated and at home during their stopover, they take pictures of them and put them up on their Web site. I can't tell you how wonderful it was to see these pictures of my baby boy...but maybe you can imagine..... :)

Here's his plane coming in for a landing. No, you can't see him yet..... :)

There he is.....unloading from the plane and looking a bit tired.

Still looking tired.....still not smiling.....hmmm.

Ahhhh, he looks a bit happier now after putting some food in his belly.

Now this is the smile I know.....and one a mother can wrap her heart around..... :)

There are no words that could possibly express how wonderful these Maine Troop Greeters are. The love and appreciation they show our troops as they come and go from the U.S. is absolutely incredible. They don't have to do it, they choose to.....and at all hours of the day and night. They don't just say that they support the troops, they do it.....and they are, in my book, true patriots.

And he's gone...again

2008-06-14T20:38:00.000-07:00

We had a wonderful long weekend with Seth and Katie and the boys, camping and floating the river...steaks cooked over an open wood fire are unbelievably incredible. We returned to Fort Hood Sunday, just early enough to get ready for a bunch of Seth's buddies to come over for a cookout. It was a "BYOB/BYOM (bring your own meat)" thing, and boy was there a variety of meat. We had fajita meat, steaks, chicken, hamburgers, hot dogs, and even stew meat (?). Everyone was cleaning out their freezers prior to the deployment. We met so many people that I'll never be able to remember all their names, but it was great fun. Several asked to store a few things at Seth and Katie's place...guitars, tough boxes, bags, etc...these were, of course, the single guys who didn't want to mess with sending stuff home and didn't want to have to pay for a storage unit to store just a few things. It's a good thing Seth and Katie have a huge basement..... :)

It was a great weekend...even though I knew it would be the last time I'd see Seth for a while. I wasn't there when he left this time...we said our goodbyes and I got "one more hug" Monday night before we headed home. But my heart and mind were there when he left. I watched the clock all day, thinking about what he was doing at that moment. 0630...the bag drop; next...back to battalian to draw weapons; then...formation and loading onto buses to be whisked away to the airport. Katie took some wonderful pictures, though, and sent some to me. So now I can look at my baby boy's smiling face any time I want to...thanks, Katie..... :) There are some other great pictures over at Katie's blog.

Well, looks like it's back to sleeping with the old cell phone again..... :)

Off to say goodbye...

2008-06-04T08:08:00.000-07:00

Seth's deployment seemed so far off once, like it would never really get here . . . but suddenly, it's right around the corner. How is that possible? How did it get here so quick? And shouldn't it be easier this time? Well, it is . . . and it isn't.

I've done this before. I know what to expect with a deployment. I know some of the tricks of the trade this time around. I know things have improved over there lately. I know he'll be in a place that's not as dangerous as some. I know he can take care of himself . . . well, mostly . . . . . :) So it should be easier this time, right? My emotions should be in check this time, right? Yeah, well, that's what I keep telling myself . . . . .

I also know that Iraq is not a good place to be no matter where you are. I know that this deployment will be longer than the last one . . . 15 months. No, the change to 12-month deployments doesn't mean anything for him, only for those deploying after August 1 . . . they will probably beat him home. I know that he's leaving a pregnant wife behind this time. I know that his son will be born while he's away. And I know that same son will be about a year old before Seth redeploys. Yeah . . . easier . . . . .

Well, anyway, we're off to say goodbye tomorrow. Seth has a 4-day weekend, his last weekend before he leaves, and we plan to spend it camping, floating the river, sitting around a campfire at night, talking, laughing, and basically just hanging out . . . the whole family. I'm really looking forward to the long weekend and the time we'll spend together . . . but I'm not looking forward to the goodbye.

Mothers Day

2008-05-16T08:00:00.000-07:00

It all started with an announcement from the kids that I had to be dressed for the weather and ready to go by about noon on Sunday. They had something up their sleeves, but no one was talking . . . not even Ken.

They all bopped over to the house about noon and stood around for a few minutes. Then Kevin and Katie disappeared, leaving Seth and Rick to hang out and make small talk. After 15 minutes or so, Rick's phone rang . . . "Taco Bueno," he answered, mumbling something else too low for me to hear. His phone rang a couple more times . . . with the same answer, I might add . . . until finally he said it was time to go.

Alrighty then . . . we jumped in my car and I drove . . . too many passengers for the pickup truck . . . following Rick's directions. We ended up out at White Rock Lake. We drove around the lake until Rick said to pull in and park. There, sitting on a quilt, were Kevin and Katie with a box of chicken, a cooler full of drinks, a bouquet of flowers, and a singing card that made me cry because of the sweet things they wrote in it.

I have to admit, I reminisced a bit as the boys wrestled and picked at each other. Watching them throw leftover biscuits to the ducks took me back to a day when they were all wee little boys. As Katie and I sat on the quilt watching the guys be goofy, I said, "just think, Katie, one day you'll be watching your grown-up son just like this." She smiled, grabbed my hand, and pressed it against her belly . . . my grandson was kicking up a storm. It was a perfectly wonderful day!!!

It's a boy!!!

2008-05-07T10:05:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to write a short note to tell all of you that it's a boy. I think I know what to do with a boy, don't you? . . . hehehe

Katie sent me this picture that was taken when they did the ultrasound last week. I'm in love with the little guy already, and can't wait to hold him . . . . . :)

They're coming in this weekend and will be here for a little over a week. I can't wait to see them and I will forewarn you, Katie, I'm gonna have to touch that belly . . . . . :)

Busy, busy . . .

2008-04-18T23:05:00.000-07:00

Well, as you can probably tell, since I haven't posted in a month, life continues to be extremely busy. Ken's surgery went very well. The old stabbing pain that radiated up into his head seems to be gone...yay!!! He has very sore neck muscles from the surgery, but he's feeling a little bit better everyday. He looks and acts more like his old self now...I sure have missed him. We continue to hope and pray for his continued improvement.

Katie is doing well...her belly is getting bigger...to where she can't wear her old clothes anymore, but isn't really big enough for maternity clothes yet...I remember those days..... :) My sisters and I are planning a girls/guys baby shower for her and Seth next month. It's kind of early for a shower, but we wanted to do it before Seth's deployment in June. We wanted him to be able to feel like he was a part of everything...especially since he'll be gone when the baby comes in September. We're planning some GREAT games for the guys...teehee. His battery is getting a couple weeks of block leave in May, so that'll be the best time for the shower...and, unfortunately, a farewell. Talk about bittersweet.....

I'm in between business trips right now...just got back from one Wednesday night and will leave on another Sunday morning. Then I have one more the end of April, after which things should slow down enough for me to spend some time with my family. I think I'll take a couple days off while Seth and Katie are in town...that way Katie and I can spend some time "wishing" at Babies "R" Us, and I can get plenty of hugs from Seth before he leaves. Like I said...bittersweet.....

Life continues to amaze me, though, and I'm enjoying every minute of it...I am so blessed!!!

It's been a while...

2008-03-17T22:43:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I wrote anything here. It just seems like my life has been crazy lately. Work has been crazy busy, and it seems that home life has been the same way. It's not a bad thing, just a busy thing.

To begin with, I've made 3 business trips in the last 5 weeks, and have 3 more coming up in April. I must have walked more than 30 miles last week at the largest construction and aggregate equipment conference in North America, which only happens once every 3 years...thank goodness!!! My feet and legs hurt for 2 days after I got home, and my shoulder feels bruised from carrying a briefcase full of crap that I picked up at the show. The late night events and early morning conferences didn't help much, either. However, I'm good as new now and volleyball has started up again...you just can't keep me down for long..... :)

My hubby is having surgery the end of this month; this has been an ongoing ordeal for some time and is all related to the motorcycle accident he had nearly 3 years ago. Hopefully, the surgery will alleviate the pain he's having. And yes, we're still trying to collect from the other guy's insurance company. We had to resort to a lawyer and a lawsuit before the 2-year statute of limitations ran out, but we're moving along with that also. Between Ken's physical health and the legal stuff, I sometimes wonder if life will ever return to normal, or at least to some semblance of normalcy that resembles life prior to the accident. It has been a long, long haul.

I'm also in the process of setting up an office at home...as our small, 2-person office will be closing this fall. I'm looking forward to working from home, but I have so much to do to get the room ready...aarrrrggghhh!!! I have to erase 20+ years of boys from the room with alot of patching, texturing, and painting. Traveling alot doesn't help with that very much either.

On a much happier note, after a couple of heartbreaking miscarriages last year, Seth and Katie are going to make me a grandmother in September. Wow, I love the sound of that. She has passed the critical first trimester and everything is going well. It's just now beginning to sink in, though, because I wouldn't let myself get very excited about it at first. I was so afraid that the same thing would happen again and that it would just destroy her this time. She's a strong young woman, but that kind of thing is hard on even the stongest. She's doing great, though, and is feeling good, so I'm getting really excited now. The thought of Seth having a kid of his own just floors me, though. He's such a character...and a mess. As Katie puts it..."I'm going to give birth to the spawn of Satan"...I couldn't say it any better myself..... :) I do love all my babies, including the girl brave enough to marry one of them, and will love my grandbabies just as much!!!

Puppies are punks...

2008-01-15T18:52:00.000-08:00

Yep, that's what I said, puppies are punks.

My hubby is pretty sick right now with a bad head cold, but he spent an hour or so yesterday afternoon putting some pipe wrap around a couple of exposed water pipes on the back of the house. He knew a cold front was headed in tomorrow and was trying to do what he could to ensure that we wouldn't have any frozen pipes. After he finished the task and headed in to wrap up in one of our woobies, I stayed out for a while picking up puppy messes and noticed that Gus was eyeing a couple of the freshly covered pipes. Something told me that wasn't a good thing, so I put a couple things in front of the pipes so they'd be out of sight and, hopefully, out of mind.

Welllllllll, when I went out to feed the puppies this morning, there were little pieces of pipe wrap aaaalllllll over the yard. There wasn't even a trace of wrap on any of the pipes, including the ones I had tried to hide from them. Aaaarrrrgggghhhhh!!!!!! Puppies!!!!!

Wait a minute, they aren't even "legally" puppies anymore, they turned a year old right before Christmas. But they still act like puppies, eating every freaking thing in sight...and out of sight, too. It's a good thing they're cute..... :)

A frosty Christmas Eve

2007-12-24T14:20:00.000-08:00

I was wrapping presents last night when my little sister called and said I had to go out to look at the bright star hanging just to the top right side of the full moon. Wow!!! As I stood gazing at the star, shivering in the cold, my thoughts took me to another place and time...that of the very first Christmas. Oh, what it must have been like to have been there. I thought of the song by John Denver. It's called Noel: Christmas Eve, 1913 and was taken from a poem written long ago by Robert Bridges. It's not a very well-known song, but it speaks of what I was feeling as I looked at that star last night, and what it must have been like the night of our Savior's birth. Maybe it's just a little bit more special to me because I was born on a frosty Christmas Eve many years ago. Anyway, if you have clear skies tonight, take a moment to check out that bright star by the full moon. And if you have the Christmas CD by John Denver and the Muppets, listen to that song. For those of you who don't have the CD, I've posted the words below......very appropriate for Christmas Eve.....

A frosty Christmas Eve,
When the stars were shining,
I traveled forth alone,
Where westward falls the hill.
And for many, many a village
In the darkness of the valley
Distant music reached me,
Peals of bells were ringing.

Then sped my thoughts to olden times,
To that first of Christmases,
When shepherds who were watching
Heard music in the fields.
And they sat there and they marveled,
And they knew they could not tell
Whether it were angels
Or the bright stars a singing.

But to me heard afar,
It was starry music,
The singing of the angels,
The comfort of our Lord.
Words of old that come a traveling
By the riches of the times,
And I softly listened
As I stood upon the hill.
And I softly listened
As I stood upon the hill.

Merry Christmas, my friends, and many blessings to you and your families and loved ones......wherever they may be..... :)

Christmases past

2007-12-20T01:14:00.000-08:00

I finally finished decorating our Christmas tree last night. I have to admit that it has been a struggle this year. Not for the usual reasons, like having sons on opposite ends of the Earth or anything like that. I mean, all of the boys will be home for Christmas this year, so what do I have to complain about...right?? It just seems to have been difficult this year.

For one thing, my two oldest boys were living here for a while until they found a house to lease. We had stuff piled everywhere, which put my decorating plans on hold. Even if I could have gotten to the Christmas tree in the attic, I had no place to set it up. Then when it came time for them to move into their house, the weather was terrible, so it took over a week for them to get completely moved out...and of course, we were part of the moving crew..... :)

Another thing is that I caught a cold over a week ago and haven't felt much like decorating or shopping or anything. Now that the worst part of my cold is over, I have this lingering cough that's driving me crazy and wearing me out. Arrrggghhhhh!!!!

Anyway, I've been thinking alot about Christmases past...yeah, okay, reminiscing..... :)

When the boys were young, they got up earlier and earlier every year on Christmas morning, until we finally told them they couldn't wake us up before 6 a.m. Right!!! Ken and I would laugh as we listened to them whispering in their rooms before 6, and then hear one of them sneak down the hall and then go running back to tell his brothers that Santa had been there. They could hardly contain themselves.....lol.

When they were teenagers, and the Santa Claus thing had worn thin, they slept later...we wouldn't get up until 7...hahaha. What can I say?? Christmas is just magical...even at my age.

In 1998 came the military years. Kevin would come in from Barksdale AFB for Christmas and the boys would all sleep in until 9. Talk about a role reversal, Ken and I would be the first ones up, after all those years of being dragged out of bed before dawn by antsy little boys, and we were waking them up. Then came 2002, when Seth joined the Army and went off to basic training right before Thanksgiving. They actually let them go home for Christmas in the middle of boot camp, which shocked me, but I was thrilled. That was the last year all the boys were home for Christmas together until last year. Christmas 2003, Seth was in Korea and Kevin was in Alaska; in 2004, Seth was here, but Kevin was still in Alaska; 2005, Kevin was still in the great white north, and Seth had just left for Iraq. As difficult a time as that was for me to have two sons away from home at Christmas, it was even harder for Katie, but she was a real treasure to me that Christmas. Watching her give Ken a hard time while we decorated the Christmas tree made me laugh. I mentally thanked Seth at that time for giving me a daughter-in-law. Anyway, I got an email from her a few days ago about their Christmas plans and I told her that I wished she was here to help me decorate the tree like she did two years ago. She laughed and said I should get Ken to help me...yeah, right..... :) She remembered how "helpful" he was the year she was here.....hahaha.

Then last year, with all the boys and Katie here, it was absolutely wonderful. Kevin had returned to the lower 48 and could make it home without spending an arm and a leg on airfare and Seth was home from Iraq. It couldn't have been any better.

I know this Christmas will be another good one, and I'm really looking forward to it, but the decorations are lacking and I've only been shopping once. Oh well, the shopping may not get finished, but c'est la vie...that's not the important thing. What's important is that I'll be surrounded by my wonderful family...my hubby of 35 years, my three boys, and my sweet daughter-in-law. I can't complain..... :)

Exciting news

2007-12-07T23:21:00.000-08:00

There's been so much going on lately...I just had to tell everyone about it.

Rick found a nice house and he and Kevin will be moving in this weekend. I'm excited about this for several reasons. For one, they've been planning this and looking forward to it since before Kevin left active duty in May. The house is bigger than our little crackerbox and has a nice yard for Sierra, Kevin's pup...the one we've been taking care of since February. Sure, I'm going to miss them, but it's only about a 15-minute drive from here. Which brings me to the second reason I'm excited about this. Rick has been living with us for about a week now because he had to vacate his apartment before the house became available, so every corner of space is packed with stuff. So...once they move all their stuff out of the garage, I'll finally be able to get to my Christmas tree..... :)

Seth turned 26 yesterday, and it was so exciting to get to hear his voice on the phone. He was originally supposed to be here for his birthday, but their conex came in from their trip to NTC and he was called into work. Oh well, at least I got to talk to him. It's so hard for me to believe that my baby boy is that old. I can still picture all of the boys as...well...boys..... :) Anyway, happy birthday, baby boy!!!

But probably the most exciting news today is that Kevin completed the first step in his big dream...the one that he left active duty for. He got his helicopter pilot's license today.....yeehaw. He texted me at about 7 pm tonight, saying "I am now a pilot." I was driving home from the airport on my way home from a business trip and couldn't stop smiling after that. Even the terrible traffic couldn't make me stop smiling.

There's something so overwhelmingly wonderful about watching your children grow and seeing their plans and dreams come to fruition...no matter what that dream may be..... :)

You broke what???

2007-11-19T00:37:00.000-08:00

I had a call from my baby boy last night. He's at NTC (National Training Center) in California training for his next deployment to the sandbox. Yeah, he's supposed to go back some time next summer. And no, we're trying not to think about it too much. Anyway, the conversation started out something like this . . .

Seth: Hello Mother

Me: Well, hello Son (I just had to return the formality of him calling me mother) . . . or should I say . . . hello baby boy

Seth: Hahaha . . . well, your baby boy has a cast on his arm . . .

Me: *sigh*

Those of you who have been reading my blog since the beginning might remember that Seth was wearing a boot cast on his left foot when he deployed on December 6, 2005 . . . he ran into a telephone pole on his three-wheeler the Friday after Thanksgiving, dislocating his big toe and breaking the one next to it. And, I believe I told you that he had broken his foot a couple times before that when he was still in school - once jumping off the roof of the elementary school down the street and once when a friend catapulted him into the air to do a back flip (don't ask). Well, now it's his hand . . . geez. I didn't quite understand what he was trying to tell me about how he did it, but it had something to do with his hand getting caught between his M-16 and a hard place . . . like his humvee. *Sigh* . . . what's a mother to do???

When I told his brothers about it, they just looked at each other, totally unsurprised, and said, "The timing's not right, it's not close enough to his deployment . . . he won't still be wearing the cast when he deploys this time." Aren't brothers just the most thoughtful and caring people . . . . . :)

Missing my little boys

2007-11-13T00:55:00.000-08:00

I was listening to the radio on my way to work this morning and heard that song - Stealing Cinderella - about the way a father sees his daughter even after she's grown and about to be married...the way my dad still sees me sometimes..... :) As I sang along with the song, I began to cry...I realized just how much I miss my little boys. The song made me think about when they were little...playing at the park, riding bikes, rollerblading, running through the sprinkler, and playing in the sandbox (the one in the back yard, not the one in the middle east).

None of my boys were Cinderella by any means, or even Prince Charming for that matter, but they were my little boys and they have definitely been stolen away. Kevin was stolen by the Air Force when he was only 18 (I cried all night the day he left for basic training); Rick was stolen by his wisdom and maturity (he's such a wonderful young man); and Seth, my baby boy, was stolen first by the Army and then by Katie. But mostly, they've all been stolen away because they grew up. They aren't my little boys anymore, they're all men.

I don't have any hard feelings about any of it, though. In fact, I'm extremely proud of them and the men they've become. I'm just feeling a little nostalgic today and a bit weepy, because I'm missing the time when they were little. I guess it comes with getting older and watching them leave home and live their own lives.

I'll be fine, really, but I have some advice for all you mothers out there with young children. Hug them tightly while you can and spend every possible moment with them...they grow up so fast..... :)

Have you hugged a vet today???

2007-11-11T15:05:00.000-08:00

I know I haven't been on here much lately, but I am still around. I have just one simple thing to ask all of you...have you hugged a vet today?? If not, there's still time to do that..... :)

I hugged my dad this morning and listened to some of his WWII stories...which I never get tired of hearing. I e-mailed a friend who is an OIF vet. I hugged Kevin...it's nice that he's here this year. And I texted a hug to Seth, who is at NTC right now...yeah, training to return to the sand...and no, he won't be home for Thanksgiving...again...*sigh*. There was one less vet to send my regards to this year...my dad's older brother who died on Memorial Day...but I thought about him, and my dad's younger brother who died many years ago, and my grandfather who served in the Navy in WWI.

I'm truly blessed to have so many vets in my life..... :)

Sleeping with the windows open...

2007-10-19T11:40:00.000-07:00

. . . feeling the breeze as it blows across you . . . listening to the night sounds . . . snuggling under the covers on the really cool nights (like last night . . . and it's about time) . . . bemoaning the fact that you have to get out of that nice warm bed and go to work (like this morning . . . hmmm). There's nothing quite like sleeping with the windows open, at least not for me. I live for this time of year when I can keep the windows open all the time. And there's always the bonus of having nice low utility bills . . . . . :)

However, I feel like it's something that alot of the younger generation doesn't understand or appreciate. For example, our nextdoor neighbor is the age of our oldest son (30ish) and I always hear his air conditioner running at night, even when it's nice and cool outside. Now, maybe it's not his fault, maybe he was raised in a climate-controlled home with single-hung storm windows that didn't open at the top and no attic fan. Pity!!!

I grew up falling asleep to the hum (and rattle) of an attic fan that pulled in the elusive cool air from outside. You sure don't find those in new homes these days. We would get in front of the fans in the house and talk into them to create that great strobe-effect sound . . . if you don't know what I'm talking about, you should try it . . . . . :) And my boys all grew up sleeping with the windows open when it was nice outside. They know the sound of a slamming screen door . . . we're talking the old-fashioned non-stormdoor type here.

This is a wonderful time of year and takes me back to a much gentler time . . . when you didn't have to worry about your kids walking to school alone or riding their bikes to the store or staying out after dark during the summer playing hide and seek with their friends all over the neighborhood. Ahhhhhh . . . but that's another story . . . . . :)

A trip to Fort Hood

2007-09-14T10:17:00.000-07:00

I spent a couple nights at Fort Hood the past week. I had business in San Antonio and stopped over to visit with Katie and Seth . . . they live halfway, so it breaks up the drive nicely. Every time I stay with them on post, I feel like I'm in a special country. Kevin and Seth and Katie have lived on and near military bases or posts for so long that they take for granted some of the things that make them so special . . . at least to me . . . things you just don't find anywhere else. For instance . . .

1. Military uniforms . . . you see people in Army ACUs everywhere you go . . . even off the post or base. They were at the gas station, the grocery store, the restaurant . . . everywhere I looked. Okay, maybe I'm the only person that gets a kick out of that, but they were everywhere.

2. Reveille . . . where else can you get a wake-up call like that. I asked Katie if I could sleep with a window open so I could hear it in the morning and she laughed. Okay, again, I may be the only person who likes to be awakened by a bugle call, but it sure put a smile on my face as I stretched and woke up. I missed the other two bugle calls. I didn't get there in time to hear Retreat, and with the house all closed up later that night, I couldn't hear Taps when it was played. . . and I did so want to hear Taps while I was there. There's just something so meaningful and moving about that one. I can recall talking to Kevin on the phone some nights while he was living in the dorms at Barksdale. He always had to go out on his balcony to get reception for his phone . . . those dorms were like bunkers . . . and he'd stop talking when Taps was played and I could hear it in the background. It was cool!!!

3. Helicopters . . . they were flying back and forth between the air field and the field where maneuvers were taking place . . . four at a time . . . it was great. What can I say, I love watching military helicopters and planes. Did I mention how many Mothers Days I've spent at the air show at Barksdale AFB while Kevin was stationed there? Well, it was quite a few, and I'd do it again in a heartbeat. I love air shows on military bases . . . regular civilian air shows can't hold a candle to them. The one we went to in Alaska was really cool, with paratroopers and everything. Anyway, it was cool watching the helicopters come and go.

4. Artillery . . . yep, I'm talking big booms that would sometimes rattle the walls of their house. You didn't have to leave a window open to hear it either. Katie and I sat out on the front porch drinking hot tea, enjoying the cool morning breeze, and listening to artillery in the distance blowing something to Kingdom come. It was awesome!!!

5. Flags . . . at the front gate, at every building, and waving from front porches in the housing area . . . alot more than you see in Dallas . . . and it makes my heart sing when I see so many American flags. What can I say, I'm a diehard patriot. I sometimes sit in my backyard and just watch the flag flutter in the breeze over our house.

Being at Fort Hood evokes so many feelings in me that it's sometimes hard to sort them all out, but I know it fills me with feelings of pride and a sense of awe that I don't find out here in the "real world." I really like it there . . . . . :)

Yeehaw!!!

2007-08-22T12:30:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here scratching chigger bites (in some very personal places I might add), moving a bit slow because of sore muscles, and my lower legs are itchy and covered with scratches and bruises. You might think that's a shame, but all I can say is . . . what a great weekend!!!!

We (Ken, Rick, Kevin, me, and Caleb, my nephew who is practically a son) made an overnight trip to the country. We took all the 3- and 4-wheelers and spent Sunday morning riding the pastures looking for a newborn calf. We found him, even though his mother had him well hidden, and encouraged her, with the help of the noisy wheelers, to bring him to the front pasture with the rest of the herd. His momma, of course, took the route through the woods, so we had to ride and walk through the undergrowth, stickers, brambles, and poison ivy. We call it deep-woods navigation. (Note to self: next time wear long pants . . . :) It's even more interesting when you pull a trailer behind one of the wheelers. But when you start pulling a 4-wheeler in a trailer behind another 4-wheeler, I call it 4-wheeling redneck style. Leave it to that bunch to come up with this idea . . . . . :)

After the work was done, it was time for another try at making the trek to a neighboring town by way of the backroads on the wheelers. Why??? Because it's a fun ride with lots of dirt roads and mud. We'd tried to make the trip a couple other times, but the road goes through the bottoms (where it crosses several creeks) and the way was blocked by water across the road due to all the rain we've had this spring and summer. It had been too deep to drive through before. One time, Rick, on the only 4-wheel-drive 4-wheeler out of the bunch, got stuck and we had to work to get him out. By the time he got unstuck, he was covered with mud and we were laughing so hard. I wish I'd gotten a picture of that. See Rick is the quiet one who never gets as muddy as the others when they go wheeling . . . . . until that day. Anyway, the way was still blocked Sunday, but not as badly as before. So we threw some branches into the truck ruts (did I tell you that there was an abandoned truck stuck in the mud on the side of the road?? And a 4-wheel-drive truck at that . . . we're talking ooey-gooey, suck-you-into-it MUD). We finally got through the ruts to the woods, drove through the woods a bit, and came back out on the road past the bad part. But we were pretty muddy anyway. Once we got past the bad section, we rode on up the road throwing mud clods all over the place off the tires. It has this way of making an arc over the wheeler from back to front and coming down on your head and in front of you, kind of like riding in a rolling mud clod. When we got back to high ground, we sat there trying to decide whether to go on to the town down around the bend or not. My nephew said it was already 6 pm and beer time, so we about-faced and went back through the mud one more time, laughing like hell, heading home.

It was a great day!!! A GREAT day!!!! I'm a very lucky mom. My boys don't mind me tagging along on their excursions . . . and Heaven help me, I love every minute of it . . . . . :)

Oh yeah . . . 31 years ago, a little boy came into my life and changed it forever. That's him on the 4-wheeler on the far left . . . (Kevin's in the foreground checking out the mud and Caleb is down the road there with a buried-up 3-wheeler). Anyway, I just wanted to say Happy Birthday, Rick!!!! I love you with all my heart . . . and you still light up my life . . . . . :)

Fizzy

2007-07-20T11:30:00.000-07:00

Nearly 10 years ago, I rescued a litter of five orphaned kittens who couldn't have been more than a week old. We had gone to Ken's mom's house in the country one Friday afternoon and every time we walked out the door, we could hear kittens crying underneath the porch. Ken's mom said they had been crying for a day or two before we got there, that something must have happened to their mother. Having the soft heart I do for animals...and for babies in general...I tore off one of the side boards of the porch and started calling to them. The first one out was Fizzy...screaming her head off...and she was followed by four more. All were solid gray, and none of them had their eyes open yet. They were filthy and starving, so I mixed up some formula, found an eye dropper, and fed them. Then I gave them a sponge bath to remove all the dirt and cobwebs they had picked up under the house. When I washed Fizzy's face, she looked just like the fuzzy little creature named Fizzgig in the movie, Dark Crystal. So that's what we named her, but we called her Fizzy for short.

Needless to say, all five kittens came home with me at the end of the weekend and I became their mother...bottle feeding them four or five times a day. Fizzy was the most demanding of the bunch. She'd take short little catnaps and then wake up her brothers and sisters with her crying. As they got older, she continued to be the biggest crybaby of the bunch, and I couldn't wait for her to get old enough to give away...I didn't want a long-haired cat that demanded attention all the time...but as every cat person knows, we don't choose the cat, the cat chooses us.......thus, Fizzy remained with us and the others were given away. She stole our hearts.

She and Rick became great buddies...out of all three boys, he's the one she adored. Kevin joined the Air Force when she was still a kitten, so they never really bonded; Seth, being like he is, loved to torment her, which she enjoyed sometimes, so she had a love/hate relationship with him. But Fizzy and Rick had a very special bond. Even after he moved out a couple years ago, she would get in his lap whenever he came over, or "let" him pick her up so she could drape herself over his arm like a queen...and he came over regularly, to see his girl and make sure we were taking good care of her..... :)

Anyway, that brings us to a couple months ago. Fizzy started getting really picky about her food, so we changed it several times. She'd eat people food, but just didn't seem all that interested in cat food anymore. She began to lose weight...so slowly that we didn't notice at first. When I took her to the vet's office a month ago for her shots, she was a pound lighter than she had been the year before. The vet looked her over and couldn't see any problems, but told me to bring her back if she didn't start eating better. We bought some canned food, which she seemed to like, so we didn't worry too much. Then I left town for a week on business. I came home to find a much skinnier Fizzy. Maybe it took being gone for a week to notice the change in her, but it was drastic. I took her to the vet the next morning, Saturday, and she had lost another pound in just a couple weeks. They took blood and urine for tests, but said they wouldn't get the results back until Monday, so we took her home and tried to get her to eat a little canned food. By Sunday afternoon, she was so weak she would hardly move. I was leaving town again early Monday morning before the vet's office opened, so Rick said he'd take her in, even if his boss didn't understand and it cost him his job. I knew he'd take good care of her, but I worried about being gone for three days. I sat up with her for a long time that night, even though I had to get up at 4 a.m. to finish packing and catch a 6:50 flight. I sat on the floor with her for a long time, into the wee hours of the morning, just petting her softly and talking to her...and crying. I had this feeling that it would be the last time I would ever see her.....

I spent the next two days in meetings in Chicago and I can't really tell you what was talked about. I only remember talking to Rick on the phone...listening to his messages and calling him back during breaks in the meetings...and trying to compose myself after every conversation because they all contained bad news. By Tuesday afternoon, Rick and I reached the same conclusion...we had to let her go, we didn't want her to suffer anymore. She was so weak and in pain...and it was killing me that I wasn't there with her...but Rick was. He went to the vet's office and held her for a while. She gently draped herself across his arms, like she always used to do, and laid her head down on him one last time...I think she was saying goodbye...and I'm sure it tore Rick's heart out.

He called me when it was over...and I cried...in front of my coworkers...but I didn't care. I asked Rick to bring her home and bury her in the garden in the backyard...this was her home and where she belonged.

When I got home from Chicago the next afternoon, Rick and I stood by the garden talking about Fizzy...second-guessing our decision and wondering how it could have all happened so quickly. I hugged him for a long time...we consoled each other. Rick said he had picked up some jello and pizza for dinner that night after he buried her because those were some of Fizzy's favorite foods...but he didn't eat much. He said his whole body hurt after he got home. I know how he feels...I still have a hard time with it. I still expect to see her at home...and I know Rick still looks for her every time he walks in the door. I think it's going to take a while.....

Some things are just meant to be.....

2007-06-22T10:24:00.000-07:00

We don't always understand why things happen the way they do, at the time they do. Doors get slammed in our faces . . . our plans fall through. When we find an open window, we can't always see where the different path leads. We get frustrated and wonder why the bad stuff always happens to us, and we wonder why God hasn't heard our prayers . . . or has he???

Kevin is at his new base this week and next . . . doing his reserve duty. Actually, he's back at the base where he started out his service, Barksdale AFB . . . working on B-52s once again. He discovered that, after being gone almost 4 years, there are still some people he knows at the base. One of his favorite old supervisors is retiring today, and one of the guys he sponsored in '99 is now helping him get settled. He never expected to be back in Shreveport, but he seems to be happy with his new job and co-workers . . . I haven't seen him happy about his job since he left Alaska last summer. What's really interesting is, this is not the path he originally chose, but it is the path he ended up on . . . and it has turned out to be a good path.

The first thing I should explain is that Kevin is in the Air Force Reserve now, but he works with and is part of an active-duty maintenance unit. I know, how does a reservist end up being assigned to an active-duty group? Well, it's like this . . . Kevin is IMA (Individual Mobilization Augmentee . . . I think), which is a unique position reserved for former active-duty personnel who know their stuff and don't need a lot of supervision. He has to work 24 days a year, as well as a 2-week summer term, and can pretty much choose when he wants to work . . . all at one time or one week at a time. No one-weekend-a-month . . . no weekends period. While he was inprocessing, most of the people he had to check in with didn't understand where to put him because of this. There aren't many IMA positions, apparently, and when he told them he was in the Reserve, they wanted to process him into the Reserve unit on base, but that's not where he belongs. He belongs to an active-duty unit. So he had to tell them who he was replacing and tell them to set him up like that other guy. They'd say . . . "Oh, okaaaay," but still seemed confused by the whole thing. He found it pretty amusing.

When he got a chance, he stopped by to visit the 11th Bomb Squadron . . . his old stomping grounds. He got to see a few old friends there. He called me later to tell me how laid back Barksdale was compared to his last base. He commented that there was a big difference between bases with fighters and bases with "heavies," a difference in attitudes and the way the bases are run." Needless to say, he prefers the "heavies" base.

When he got some spare time, he went to the 8th Air Force Museum and souvenir shop. He wanted some new stickers for his truck, of course. We especially like the one with a B-52 as the inside part of a peace sign that says "Peace the old-fashioned way." I know, crude, but what can I say . . . . . :)

While at the museum, he learned about a program that had been started to help raise funds for the museum and to honor service members. The outdoor part of the museum has planes on display with plaques identifying them and telling when and where they were in service. A paved walkway winds through the planes. The museum is outlining the walkway with bricks to dress it up a bit. But what's really neat is you can order a brick for $50 and request that the name, squadron, dates of service, etc. of a service member be engraved on it. You can even request a particular location for the brick to be placed along the walkway. Kevin's first thought was of Uncle Bruce, whom I wrote about in my Memorial Day post. He was a B-17 pilot, and was also in the 8th Air Force. Kevin wanted to get some more information about what squadron he was in and such so he could buy a brick for the walkway and request that it be placed in front of the B-17. How cool is that!!!?????!!!!!!

We had been wondering what we could do to honor my uncle, and this is absolutely perfect. After the brick is engraved, a picture will be taken of it and it'll be made into a postcard. Then it will be sent wherever he wants it to go. Kevin wants to have it sent to my aunt.

If Kevin had been happy at his last base in New Mexico, he never would have left active duty; if he hadn't gotten out when he did, he wouldn't have been here for my uncle's memorial service where he met and talked to a bunch of old vets (quite a treat for him); if he had been assigned to Tinker AFB in Oklahoma for reserve duty, like originally planned, he never would have known anything about the 8th Air Force Museum's fundraiser. All these disappointments were heartbreaking for Kevin when they happened, he felt betrayed by the service he had dedicated nine years to, but they also led him to where he is now . . . and the possibilities are endless. Like I said . . . some things are just meant to be.

A Memorial Day tribute

2007-05-28T18:00:00.000-07:00

Bruce, Cal, and Tommy

This is the story of three brothers who grew up hunting the riverbottoms and creekbeds around Dallas. Some of their fondest memories are of running through the woods, that have since disappeared, on the trail of a squirrel or rabbit. They would take whatever they got home to add to the pot of a family that was struggling through the Depression.

The brothers were all grown up - 18, 20, and 22 - when they heard on the radio that Pearl Harbor had been attacked. Like all the young men of that time, they wanted to join the military and serve their country. The oldest, Bruce, had just graduated from college at SMU, so he decided to join the Army Air Corps to become a pilot. The middle brother, Cal, joined the Marines because......well......he was the adventurous one and those dress uniforms looked great. The youngest, Tommy, wanted to enlist in the Army, but Bruce and Cal convinced him that he should go to college first so he could become an officer. Plus, it would save their parents the heartache of watching all three of their sons march off to war at the same time.

In less than two years, they were spread across the world. Tommy was at a college in Oklahoma, Cal was fighting his way across Japanese-held islands in the Pacific, and Bruce was flying B-17s out of England. Cal had it tough on the islands, living in tents if he was lucky, or more often, sleeping in foxholes full of water, while Bruce was housed in a small English town with all the amenities. But anyone who knows anything about the daylight bombing missions over Germany, knows that it wasn't all that easy...there were no fighters that could escort the bombers that far early on in the war. In October of 1943, on what is known as Black Thursday, the day of the now-infamous second bombing raid on Schweinfurt, Germany, Bruce's plane was one of the many planes that didn't make it back to England. His plane was hit and blew up in mid air over France. He was lucky, though, he survived, and when he parachuted to the ground, he was taken in by French farmers and hidden from the Germans. He was shuffled from one place to another by the French Underground for six months before he was finally captured by the Germans and whisked off to a POW camp in Germany.

During his time with the underground and before he was allowed any contact as a prisoner, the family didn't know whether he was alive or dead. They were only told that he was MIA. As Cal slogged through the swamps of Bougainville and up the beaches of Guam, he figured his brother was dead. He had seen the bodies of too many Marines who could never be identified and knew that their families had been told they were MIA. He didn't ever expect to see his brother again, and he wasn't sure he would ever see home again himself.

News from home was pretty non-existant on the islands...the mail moved slowly in those days...so it was quite some time before Cal found out that his brother was alive and in a POW camp somewhere in Germany. But there was other news in that letter from home…his little brother, Tommy, had dropped out of college, enlisted in the Army, and told his family that he was going to go find Bruce.

Tommy somehow managed to get himself assigned to General Patton’s group before they started their march across Europe. As a forward scout for the artillery, he was ahead of the main force most of the time and made sure he was one of the first men to enter each POW camp they encountered…...always with the hope that he would find Bruce in one of them.

One day in early 1945, they came across a POW camp where the Germans had locked the prisoners inside the huts and left them there. Tommy was walking among the huts trying to find a way inside when he yelled out to the prisoners asking them where the door was. A voice yelled back, "it's on the other side, stupid." When Tommy walked around to the other side and went in to see what idiot was calling him names, there stood the culprit......Bruce. Needless to say, it was a grand reunion......Tommy had done exactly what he set out to do.

As it turns out, Cal was wounded at Iwo Jima in February of 1945 and was sent back to the states to recuperate, so he was already in Dallas when Bruce arrived wearing a mis-matched English uniform of some sort and looking pretty skinny and shabby, but extremely happy to be home. It was Memorial Day 1945......and another grand reunion ensued. Tommy didn't make it home for a while longer, but when he did, it was definitely celebration time for those three brothers.

You may think this is the storyline for a movie or a book......and it probably could be......but it's actually the story of my dad and his brothers. Why did I decide to write about this today? It’s Memorial Day. What better day is there to tell this story? But also, today, Bruce passed from this realm to that better place where we all strive to go when our days on Earth are done. It somehow seems very fitting that he left us on Memorial Day. Tommy waits for him there, in that better place, having been the good scout and gone on ahead of his brothers, and dad looks forward to the day he'll see them both again and go hunting with his brothers once more.

Me?? I'm going to miss my uncle, I'm saddened at the loss of yet another WWII vet, and I thank God for men like my dad and his brothers, and for all those who have served or are now serving our country. My dad will be the first to tell you that they were not heroes. They were just men who did what they had to do......their jobs......just like our troops do today......but they will always be heroes to me......every one of them.

God's speed, Uncle Bruce......

Grown sons......

2007-04-09T14:22:00.000-07:00

I can't begin to tell you how wonderful they are.

The first time I really became aware of the fact that my boys were all grown up was at Seth's graduation from basic and AIT. We all traveled to Fort Sill for the occasion. I stood there surrounded by Ken and my three sons, and they all towered a head taller than me. Suddenly, I felt very small, but I felt something else, too. I remember wondering, "When did they get so tall? When did they become young men? How did I miss that transformation? Seth has only been gone for a few months, why does he seem so much older and taller? Surely, he wasn't that tall before he left......or was he???" I listened as Kevin gave Seth tips on military life and deployment like he was an old salt or something. "When did Kevin become an advisor for his little brother? They used to fight constantly." I noticed a smile on Rick's face as he talked to his two younger brothers like they were his best friends. "When did that change? When I used to tell them that some day they'd be best friends, they'd look at me horrified. When did they all become such good friends and not just brothers???" My very next feeling was an overwhelming sensation of pride and joy.

This picture was taken in one of those photo booths at a mall in Lawton, Oklahoma, the weekend Seth graduated . . . the very weekend I realized my little boys were no longer little. They were men . . . and they were good, decent men. I love this picture (sketch) because it reminds me of that day and that moment.

You might say that weekend was the end of an era......and the beginning of an amazing transition to being the mother of grown sons.

I used to worry about them all the time . . . well, that hasn't really changed . . . . . . :) But what has changed is that now they worry about me. For example, a week ago on Friday, we had a terrible storm blow through Dallas and it took out our flagpole . . . bent it right in half. We found our flags in the neighbor's tree, still attached to the flagpole, the next morning. I called Rick to see if he could come by to help us get the bent pole down from the tower. He was pretty busy fixing internet problems all around Dallas that had been caused by the storm . . . working on Saturday . . . and had been at it since early that morning. So, I told him not to worry about it, I'd use one of the safety belts he'd left at the house to climb the tower and take down the flags and the bent pole. I wasn't about to let Ken do it because of his gimpy leg from the motorcycle accident two years ago. Besides, I've always been a tomboy and can do that kind of thing. Rick said, "No, don't do that. I'll come by when I get done with work and do it. You don't need to climb that tower." I laughed and made a comment about him thinking his mom was too old to climb a tower. He just said to wait and let him do it. It was so sweet, he was worried about me . . . . . :) Well, I did go up on the roof to rescue the flags, then Ken and I ran errands. When we got home that afternoon, Rick was on the roof lowering the pole into the yard. He had climbed that tower before we got home and taken the bent flagpole down. I couldn't help but grin as I got out of the truck.

Another example is what happened last week. A couple of strange men popped into my office who had no business being there. I don't work in a public store or the like, I work in a small two-person editorial office. The only people who are supposed to come into the office are people from UPS, FedEx, the US mail, etc. Get my drift? Both of these men said they were just looking around . . . for what we're not sure . . . but we called security on both of them. We're on the 5th floor of a large bank building . . . people don't just wander in off the street . . . at least not until last week. Both encounters were weird and unnerving because of the mens' demeanors. One was, I think, fairly harmless. I believe he was just curious about our magazine. But the other one was an ex-con who was supposed to be on the 3rd floor at an employment agency that specializes in finding jobs for ex-cons. What he was doing on the 5th floor coming in our office is beyond me, but my boss was sure he was up to no good. Two weird encounters in one week . . . the first time in the 7 years that I've worked there . . . and now my boss gone for the week . . . which means I'm the only one in the office. Anyway, Ken and I met Rick for our standing Wednesday night dinner date and I told Rick about the two visitors and how I was going to be on my own this week. Rick said, "You need to keep the door locked any time you're there by yourself." I expected that reaction from Ken, but here was my oldest boy, whom I still worried about, worrying about me. I couldn't help but smile!!!

Seth and Katie didn't make it in this weekend. They were both sick last week and still weren't feeling quite up to the drive. But Kevin came in, and he and Rick helped us put up a new flagpole and finally get our flags flying over the house again. Rick was on the roof with a rope tied to the tower to help lower it; Kevin and Ken stood beneath the tower and walked it down slowly to keep it from falling. My job . . . keep the puppies from getting in the way while they were working and keep them in the yard while the gate was open. Well, I did attach the flags and tie off the rope once everything was back in place . . . . . lol.

It's a hard thing sometimes to let my boys be the men around the house, and let them handle a lot of the tasks I've been doing myself or have done for them all these years . . . but it makes my heart sing to see the kind of men they've turned out to be . . . . . . :)

Puppies!!!!!!

2007-03-09T09:20:00.000-08:00

To make a long story short...we have puppies!!!! But I wouldn't want to do that...it would take all the fun out of it...... :) So here's the long story.

Ken's mom, as some of you know, lives in the country about 50 miles out of Dallas. And if any of you know anything about living in the country, you know that dumped animals are a major problem out there. People, for some reason, think it's better to dump a dog or cat out in the country than to take it to a shelter or, heaven forbid, shoot it. They'd rather let it be someone else's problem or let the animal starve to death or get killed by coyotes or feral dogs or wild hogs. Okay, sorry, I got off on a bit of a tangent......back to the long story.

As I said about two posts ago, we had a wonderful mixed-lab-breed dog that we got from Ken's mom about 14 years ago. He was one of 8 puppies in a litter that came from a dumped dog. We had to help her find homes for them, and Bear had stolen our hearts from the very beginning, so he found our home. Anyway, after 12 great years, we had to put him to sleep a year and a half ago when he got too old and feeble and was having trouble getting around and was struggling to breathe. I sat there in the floor at the vet's office with tears streaming down my face and held his head in my lap, petting him and talking to him, as he took his last few breaths. It literally broke our hearts, he was much more than a dog, he was a part of the family. Anyway, we weren't sure we would ever want to get another dog.

That is, until the same thing happened again. Yep, a small version of a golden retriever-mix dog turned up at Ken's mom's house in the country around Thanksgiving. Right before Christmas, she gave birth to 6 puppies...none of which look anything like her. We think maybe she stood on the corner and serviced every male dog in the area because they look like a mix of chow/wolf pups, a boxer pup, a St. Bernard pup, and something else that God only knows what it was. Anyway, we got the phone call from his mom saying she needed help finding homes for the puppies and......oh my gosh, we had avoided going out there all that time because we were afraid of what might happen. We fought it as hard as we could, but yep, you guessed it, one of them stole our hearts and found his way to our house. Not only that, our son in New Mexico, who is about to move home in less than 2 months, wanted us to take one for him as well. He can't have one where he is right now. So, now we have 2 puppies in our backyard......

Anyway, meet the latest additions to our household......Kevin's St. Bernard-looking pup, Sierra, on the left; and our wolf/chow-looking pup, Gus, on the right. (Yes, he does have black spots on his tongue.) Now tell me the truth......could you have resisted these faces????

Having the 2 of them in the backyard together has made the transition from their mother much easier for them, there hasn't been much whining or anything. We just laugh our heads off when we watch them wrestle and play. Any time one of them gets something, even if it's just a leaf, the other one wants it and the tug of war or chase is on. I'm telling you, it's hysterical. Honestly, puppies, or kittens for that matter, offer some of the best therapy for someone who needs to laugh and smile. Guaranteed...... :)

I'm still here

2007-02-23T10:30:00.000-08:00

I know it's been a long time since I last posted, but I'm still here. I've been rather busy lately. I've had a few business trips the last two months and quite a bit has been going on with the family. The two military boys have been in and out of Dallas a few times and are coming in again this weekend......or at least one of them is for sure. Anyway, I'm not quite sure where to start with all the news here, so I guess I'll start with Kevin......

After 9 years in the Air Force, Kevin has decided to leave active duty in May and pursue some of his other dreams. He wanted to cross-train into a flight crew position (flight engineer or loadmaster), but the AF wouldn't give him that option......he was stuck as a jet mechanic if he stayed there......worse than that, he went from being on the flight line in Alaska where all the action was to handing out tools at the base in New Mexico. This has been a long 7 months for him in New Mexico, so you might say he can't wait to get out. I will never understand how the military can take someone like Kevin, who is a great mechanic, loves his job and puts his all into it, and stick him in the support section handing out tools......what a waste!!! But don't get me started on that kind of stupidity.

He will still be in the military, though. He has just decided to transfer to the AF Reserve. He could have cross-trained in doing that, but the closest reserve base offering the position he wanted was in Colorado and that would have been a long drive for weekend duty once a month. So he's going to serve a year in Oklahoma, he thinks, then look at cross-training again, hopefully at a base closer to home. To say he is excited about the possibilities is putting it mildly. He has even talked about trying for Warrant Officer in the National Guard so he can get into helicopters......yikes!!! After all the helicopter crashes in Iraq lately, that sure makes a mother catch her breath. But what can I say, I'm proud of all my boys and constantly pray that their dreams will come true......somehow......some way......no matter what those dreams may be. But that's just what moms do...... military moms included...... :)

Puppy sitting

2007-01-10T07:25:00.000-08:00

When Seth and Katie came in from Fort Hood a few days before Christmas, they brought a "surprise" with them......a 6-week-old puppy named Bailey that they got from an animal rescue center on base the day before......hmmmmm. After making it very clear to them that this was NOT the kind of "surprise" someone wants to learn about after it has already arrived on their doorstep, we steeled ourselves for the onslaught of puppy pee and poop in our house......on our carpet......the carpet we just had installed a few years ago. *Sigh!!!* Did I mention that we are NOT indoor-dog people?? We've had several dogs in our time, but they've always been outside dogs. The last one was Bear, a large 80-pound lab-mix dog that we had for 13 years and loved dearly. He came in the house alot, but he lived outside. I cried when we had to put him to sleep a little over a year ago, and we haven't been able to even think about getting another dog since......and don't know if we ever will......Bear was special.

Anyway, we have an 8-year-old house cat named Fizzy who rules our roost. Needless to say, Fizzy is not enamored with the puppy being in HER house one little bit. After spending a few days hiding under our bed, she finally began standing her ground and hissing at the puppy. Well, being the young puppy she is, Bailey thinks this is wonderful and wants to play with the growling, spitting kitty and doesn't understand why she can't......hmmmmm. Chaos doesn't begin to describe our household since December 20th.

Then there's the wild-ass chicken that moved into our backyard last Spring from who knows where. She roosts in the crepe myrtle tree between our house and our neighbors' house and thinks she owns our backyard. Hell, she thinks she owns the whole neighborhood because she goes where she pleases. Ken named her Chickenzilla because she chases other birds, squirrels, and cats out of our yard. At first, Bailey was afraid of Chickenzilla because she was just as big as her, but now she loves chasing her and will run her all over the yard until she flies to the top of the wooden fence to get away. Ken has started calling Bailey a chicken hawk, after the cartoon character, of course......lol.

Well, to top it all off, Seth and Katie had planned a ski trip to Colorado with friends during his month-long leave......they planned it before they decided to get the puppy......hmmmmm. When I asked him what they planned to do with Bailey while they were gone skiing for a week, Seth smiled his little grin that he knows melts my heart and said, "We thought you might keep her." Do you see where I'm going with this???

Yup, we're puppy sitting......hmmmmm. The first thing we had to do was figure out what we were going to do with her during the day while we were at work......as she is not an outdoor dog......yet. We finally decided to cordon her off in a portion of the kitchen. "Cleanup on tile 4"..... :) I also cordon off the entire kitchen from the rest of the house, a second barrier, just in case she manages to escape the first. Fizzy loves this arrangement because she can sit on top of the room divider like a vulture and glare down at Bailey in her "cell" with a look of total contempt. Bailey is a people puppy and hates being alone all day, so she crawls all over the first person in the door every afternoon, which is usually Ken, to let us know how lonely and mistreated she has been. So far, so good, though......the blockade we rigged up seems to be working.

Nighttime is another matter, however. Seth and Katie had been letting her sleep on their bed at night to keep her from crying. I objected to this, but it fell on deaf ears......so the only way we can keep her from crying at night is to put her on our bed with us......hmmmmm. I get up several times a night when she starts getting restless to take her outside to potty. And sometimes she's just too wound up to sleep and wants to play. Can you say sleep deprivation???

But wait, there's more......Seth and Katie took MY car to Colorado......hmmmmm. I swear, the things I do for my boys......I just can't seem to say no...... :)

Bailey has one very important thing going for her, though, she is a cutie and stole our hearts the minute we saw her. What can I say??? We're suckers...... :) But hey, who can resist this face????

More news.......

2007-01-07T19:40:00.000-08:00

I wish this was more pleasant news, but it looks like I won't be a grandma as soon as we thought. Katie spent most of this weekend in the emergency room here in Dallas......and had a miscarriage this morning. Not a pleasant experience for her, but thankfully, it happened very early on before the pregnancy really had a chance to get into full swing......she was just 5 weeks along. Katie is feeling much better already, and seeing her without pain and smiling again is wonderful. Seth and Katie are very disappointed, as we all are, but they both feel like it just wasn't meant to be at this time. A very positive and healthy outlook if you ask me. They are not discouraged either and will try again, but have decided to wait a little while. Another healthy decision, as they are both still young and have plenty of time. But, how long that little while will be is anybody's guess...... :)

Big news!!!

2007-01-02T12:49:00.000-08:00

Since some of you out there already know about this and are making comments about it.....yeah, I'm talking about you, Casanova.....I thought I'd let all of you in on the big news. Seth and Katie didn't waste any time when he returned from Iraq five weeks ago.....I'm going to be a grandma in about 8 months. "Didn't waste any time" is probably an understatement.....hahaha.

The problem is, it happened so fast that I haven't really had time to get my head wrapped around it yet. With Seth's homecoming and having all the boys home for the holidays this year, as well as Seth and Katie's new puppy.....there has been one major event after another, it seems, and I have just been rolling from one event to another, in a daze. Plus I just spent a whole year trying to keep my emotions in check. Anyway, I think Seth and Katie are concerned that I'm not excited about being a grandma, and I want to reassure them that I am thrilled and I'm doing somersaults on the inside.....I never could do them on the outside anyway. It will all catch up with me when everything finally quiets down at the homefront and I get still for a few minutes. Then I'll just sit quietly and smile and dream of holding that little bundle of joy..... :)

Homecoming pictures......at last

2006-12-18T14:22:00.000-08:00

Sorry it has been so long since I wrote...it's been a busy few weeks since Seth came home, what with Christmas coming up so soon and my house to soon be bursting at the seams with the boys and Katie. But, as promised, here are some pictures from the homecoming.

We awaited his arrival in this gym, along with a ton of other families who were just as anxious as we were to see their Soldiers. A very nice lady took this picture of all of us...waiting. They were delayed an hour or so...no big surprise...but nothing could dampen our spirits.

Loud music echoed off the walls of the gym, kids ran around everywhere, and welcome home signs covered the walls and were held by family members. There were huge smiles, as well as a few tears, in the bleachers around us. The guys finally came running in, amidst smoke and cheering...it was soooo exciting and my heart was beating a mile a minute. Katie screamed so loud that she was hoarse afterwards. Here they are, our boys, standing in formation and waiting to be dismissed. Seth is in about the 4th row back from the front on the other side of the gym...we spotted him when he ran in.

After they were dismissed, Seth found us and immediately gathered up his Katie. This picture pretty much says it all...... :)
The rest of us waited in the bleachers for them so they could at least have these first few minutes alone.

You can see from the redness around Katie's eyes that she shed a few tears of joy, so did I when I saw his smiling face. Funny, it still gets to me when I think about it......go figure...... :)

After the ceremony, Seth stopped to say hello to a couple of people and to one of his Lts who came back about a month early. That Lt made every homecoming ceremony, and there were many, until all his men were home...that says alot about the caliber of officer Seth has. Finally, we picked up his bags from the holding tent and headed for the cars......and home.

What greeted Seth on the bumper of his truck was a little present from Kevin...a bumper sticker that read My brother is in the Air Force. The expression on Seth's face was priceless...as he and Kevin have a great rivalry about the Army and the Air Force...but the sticker was still there a week later..... :)

We took this picture of the brothers being brothers in the backyard of Seth & Katie's new house on base. I have a picture from about nine years ago where the two older boys were squishing Seth just like this. Some things never change......thank goodness.

This last picture shows what Seth did the rest of the week after he came to Dallas. We all headed for the country where he couldn't wait to tear up the countryside on 4-wheelers with his brothers. He got quite a bit of air on this jump...but at least he didn't break another toe......lol.

All I can say is...I'm so thankful and happy that he's home...... :)

Giving thanks......

2006-12-04T13:35:00.000-08:00

Here's a picture of my welcome home kiss for Seth, but before I post any more pictures of Seth's homecoming, I need to give thanks. It's true that Thanksgiving has come and gone, but it hasn't for me, and it may not for some time to come. I've been thinking alot about all the wonderful blessings God has bestowed on me, especially this year. I've been given so much...a wonderful family, great friends, supportive co-workers and bosses, and the safe return of my youngest from Iraq...so much more than I deserve. I'm so thankful for each and every one.

I have to start out by giving thanks for all of you guys out there in the milblogosphere who have been so very important to me. Especially those of you who have, or had, a loved one deployed. All of you have been so supportive. You've made the year move so much faster than it would have by sharing your lives and faith when I needed it so badly. You have helped me in ways you'll never know. It's funny how I've become so attached to all of you and I've never even met you, and probably never will. I wish that I could hug each and every one of you, but alas, a cyber hug is all I can send your way...for now. I want you all to know how much you've meant to me and how appreciated you are and that if you ever need anything...I'm here. And I mean that.

I want to give special thanks for those wonderful people in my life who have been there with a shoulder when I needed it, be it in person or over the phone...dad (the ancient warrior who always kept me grounded and was anxious to hear the latest about Seth's adventures), Susie and Sharon (my sisters who were such wonderful distractions and helped me keep things in perspective), Ken (my wonderful hubby who put up with me through thick and thin), Rick and Kevin (my two older sons who were just always there and steady), Gabe (Seth's buddy in Iraq who kept me informed when I couldn't talk to Seth), and Casanova (a long-distance friend who's been there, done that - deployment, that is - who put up with my emails, was always there to reassure me when things got scary, and would call to make me laugh just when I needed it most). You've all seen or heard me at my worst during this long year of deployment and have helped me find my smile again. Not many have seen me that vulnerable...after all, I'm the strong one.....right??? There's no way I could ever tell all of you how much you've meant to me without crying more than I am right now...but you'll always have my undying love...and I'll always be there for you, no matter what.

Woo hoo!!!!!!

2006-11-28T19:29:00.000-08:00

He's home!!!!!! The homecoming was so exciting and loud, but nothing was as good as seeing his smiling face this morning and getting that squeeze. I will post more later with pictures....but for now, this will have to do......woo hoo...... :)

Just waiting.......

2006-11-22T06:56:00.000-08:00

We still have no definite word on when Seth will be home...we're just waiting...and waiting...and waiting...for a call. It's really frustrating. I know the wait will be over soon, but...oh my gosh, can it possibly take any longer...arrrggghhh!!! Yes, Courtney, I'm going out to the country Friday and will go out into the woods by myself and scream at the top of my lungs..... :)

The replacements have taken over the missions, so Seth's group is just waiting, too. In talking to one of Seth's buddies this week, he told me that one of the new guys got hit already, doing the same thing Seth had been doing for the past month. That really made me catch my breath. He's going to be okay, though, and is on his way back to the states already. As a matter of fact, he'll beat Seth home and will probably be eating turkey tomorrow..... :)

And that brings me to the reason for this post...to wish all of you a very happy Thanksgiving!!! I have so much to be thankful for this year...ah, but that's another post..... :)

The empty room

2006-11-19T21:34:00.000-08:00

For almost a year now, our daughter in law has been living with us. We moved her in right after Seth left for Iraq, early last December. Now, she's gone. We moved Katie to Fort Hood this weekend...to a very nice house on post. I can't help but smile...even though I have sore muscles and an aching back...because the empty room is a sure sign that Seth is almost home......woohoo!!! Need I say more???

On a side note, yesterday was our wedding anniversary. Ken and I had planned on celebrating by going out to dinner and a movie...but that was when we thought Katie wouldn't sign for the house until tomorrow. So, instead of spending a romantic evening together, we spent the evening with Katie and Rick, toting boxes and furniture, putting things together, eating pizza, and sleeping on an air mattress on the floor. I swear, some of the things we do for our kids...... :)

The tag team has arrived...

2006-11-09T07:49:00.000-08:00

I talked to my baby boy today......on the phone!!! I can’t tell you how big my smile is, but I bet you can imagine. He hadn’t been on the IM in over a week, so I was missing him. Seth doesn’t have Internet access for his computer anymore since he moved out of his room to make way for their REPLACEMENTS. Yes, the tag team has arrived...yeehaw!!! That means that the end is definitely in sight. His buddy, who still has access to a computer all the time, told me not to worry, that Seth was okay. I said, “I know that, I just miss talking to him.” He said he’d tell Seth that his mommy wanted to talk to him...in front of the whole platoon......lol. I think he just wanted to get even with Seth for telling him he had to wear full battle rattle to a meeting, and of course, he was the only one who did...hahaha. I swear, those guys...just like Seth and his brothers. Seth says he probably won’t be on the IM anymore because there are so many guys there now that it will be almost impossible to get on one of the computers in the comm center. He’s living in the gym with 100 other guys right now...and I could hear half of them in the background while we were on the phone.....lol. Oh well, this phone call should hold me for a while. It had me fighting back the tears and then grinning like the Cheshire Cat...what a roller coaster ride...but I’m still smiling...... :)

Sisters

2006-11-05T08:35:00.000-08:00

I'm off to spend the day with my sisters. It's my younger sister's birthday today and we're going to celebrate. I'm lucky that they both live so close that we can do that. It's become a ritual for the other two to take the birthday sister out to lunch or dinner and a few hours of sisterly camaraderie.

When we get together, we laugh so hard sometimes that people in restaurants look at us like we're crazy...which just makes us laugh that much harder. We do have a good time.

Anyway, here's to my sisters who have helped me keep my sanity during a long, trying year...I don't know what I would have done without them. Happy birthday, Sooz...love you both.

A soldier's homecoming.....

2006-10-21T15:26:00.000-07:00

I was driving home yesterday listening to my favorite radio station and singing along with the music. Between songs, the DJ said that 2nd Lt. Johnny ____ was on his way home and to be sure to turn on your headlights if you were on northbound 75 to show your appreciation for his service. I got a huge grin on my face thinking that someone had called in to share their happiness at their loved one coming home from war. I wasn't on 75, but wished that I was so I could share in the excitement. All I could think about was that next month we would be welcoming Seth home and that just made my smile bigger.

After another song, the DJ once again said to remember that 2nd Lt. Johnny ____ was on his way home and to be sure to turn on your headlights and that if you saw an Army van and a hearse....

I don't remember what was said after that. It felt like a ton of bricks had just been dropped on my chest...this was not the kind of homecoming I had thought it was. My heart began to ache and the road became blurry as the tears came. I immediately thought about this young man who was probably fresh out of college and officer's school and probably younger than Seth. I thought about his family, who I'm sure had hopes and dreams of welcoming him home at the end of his deployment like we all are hoping to do with our loved ones.

Lord, please wrap your loving arms around this family...give them the strength they need to deal with such a terrible loss and help them find some peace. Surround them with family and friends and let them know how many are thinking and praying for them right now...and that their son won't be forgotten...

The ups and downs of deployment

2006-10-17T07:35:00.000-07:00

Well, we had a stunner this weekend. I was at my dad's house visiting with my Canuck brother who came in from Calgary and my other brother who drove in from Oklahoma City. We were doing our usual "someone's in town so we're having a gathering" cookout. We're a really close family...always have been...but when mom was dying of cancer 12 years ago, we came together tighter than I ever thought possible.

Anyway, back to the story...we were hanging out, joking around, and eating great grub, when Katie called...she was visiting her family in east Texas and signing for a house on base...woohoo...finally...but that's another story. She said that she'd gotten a call from Rear D (rear detachment, the guys on base who are supposed to keep soldiers' families informed). They told her that the guys would be coming home in a couple of weeks and said they'd call 4 days before their arrival to let her know what day and time. She was all aflitter...excited, yet upset, because she didn't know where they would live for the few weeks before they could take possession of their house on base. I told her not to get excited, it was probably a mistake, as Seth had already told us that he wouldn't be home this month. Sure enough, when she talked to Seth the next day, he verified that no one he knew of would be coming home in a couple of weeks. WTF?!?!?!?!

Now, I know that Rear D is trying to do their job and all, but for them to call and say that he would be home when he won't just kills me because it got Katie all wound up. It makes me want to strangle whoever it was that made that call and also makes me wonder if it was Rear D at all or some kind of prank call. I swear...the ups and downs of deployment are pretty rough sometimes. But I'm still smiling because the time is getting shorter every day, even though it's quite a bit longer than "a couple of weeks."

Keeping on......keeping on

2006-10-08T19:42:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't posted in a while...I guess it's because I haven't had anything new to say. It seems that, as you get to the backside of a deployment, you've already said it all and just don't want to think about it very much anymore for fear of sounding like a broken record. But, I wanted to let everyone know that all is well and going about as expected.

I've also been very busy lately, what with Kevin being based closer to home. He was home a couple of weekends in a row and we were doing family stuff like spending the weekend 4-wheeling in the country and going to the Texas State Fair. Then this weekend, we went his way (can you say roadtrip???) to take him his 4-wheeler, trailer and a few other things and spent the weekend with him. We just fell in about an hour ago and I'm awaiting my turn in the shower before crashing. It's a rather long drive...7 hours to be exact...which doesn't seem very long until you're on the way home. When you're on your way there, you're excited and looking forward to spending the weekend with your son, so you're laughing, singing with the radio, and have your bare feet hanging out the window with the wind blowing between your toes and.....oh wait, maybe that's just me..... :) Anyway, you have alot to look forward to, so you're in a good mood and having a great time. On the way home, it's not as much fun. You're not looking forward to anything except getting home because the weekend is over and you've already said good-bye to your son and given him that last hug..... :( So yeah, not as good a time......but a good trip nonetheless. You know I'd do it again in a heartbeat..... :)

Anyhoo, I hope all is well with all my buddies out there in the milblogosphere. I miss you guys and will try to get back in touch when I return from yet another business trip this week. Till then, take care and keep in touch.

Frustration

2006-09-18T10:01:00.000-07:00

Being on the downside of a year-long deployment is really frustrating. You can see the light at the end of the tunnel, but you're not quite there. Time seems to fly by...until you look at the calendar and realize that there are still double-digit weeks to go. It's kind of like those dreams, or nightmares, where you're running as fast as you can, but you don't seem to be moving.

Well, that's the way I feel right now, and it seems that alot of you out there are feeling the same way. So close...yet so far. We all know that the time will pass...we all know that eventually they will be home...we all know that we need to keep on keeping on...but it doesn't make it any easier.

Five years ago...today

2006-09-11T20:58:00.000-07:00

I first heard about the World Trade Center attacks on my way to work...five years ago, today. At first, I thought it was a joke, but when I heard that a second plane hit a second building, I knew it wasn't.

By the time I got to work, a third plane hit the Pentagon and a fourth was suspected of being on it's way to the White House. I immediately picked up the phone and started calling my family. I called my youngest son at home and woke him up. I called my dad to see if he had the TV on...he did. I called my husband at work...he and his co-workers were watching the news. I called my oldest son...he was on top of a building in downtown Dallas setting up an antennae and said everyone was making a mass exodus from the city like it was quitting time. He commented on how quiet it was up on the roof...for the first time that he could ever recall, there were no planes flying overhead...he said it was freaky.

Later that day, I talked to my middle son who was stationed at Barksdale Air Force Base in Shreveport. They had been in the middle of an exercise on base and had to immediately stand down and shift gears from make believe to real world. He commented weeks later how good it felt to be on the flight line the day they launched dozens of B-52s to head for the Middle East...his only regret was that he wasn't going with them.

We all have our memories of that day, and were all affected by the attack in one way or another, but one of the most moving things that happened afterwards was the appearance of U.S. flags everywhere. They hung from buildings, bridges, homes, trees, fences, cars, antennaes...anything that stood still long enough to have one attached. I've never been more proud of my countrymen than I was in the days following the attacks. I have only one question...well, actually two......why does it take a disaster to get our nation to unite...and what happened to that patriotism??

Celebrating the end of summer

2006-08-31T07:29:00.000-07:00

I don’t know about you, but I feel like celebrating the last official day of summer. I sit here at my computer and can’t help but smile. As a matter of fact, I feel almost giddy. Why, you ask?? Well, there are several reasons.

One is that we’ve had one of the hottest summers on record this year, with more than 40 days of temperatures over 100 degrees...all the way up to 108 some days. Finally, this week, we’ve had a break from that heat with highs in the 90s and a wee bit of rain to boot. It’s actually pleasant to sit outside again after lunch to soak up the fresh air. Hmmmm......what office???

Another reason is that Fall is my all-time, very most favorite time of year. I am soooooo ready for that. The country girl in me can’t wait to put on those jeans and flannel shirts and sweaters that are so comfy and cozy to run around in when it’s chilly outside...must be a throwback to my childhood days in the countryside of Greenwood, Louisiana (find that on a map...lol) in my jeans and flannel shirt, with my long hair in braids, wearing a cowboy hat, riding a stick horse and wearing a six-shooter ‘n holster and...really, there are pictures of me dressed like that...lol. I love crunching in the leaves that fall off the trees...ask my dad and sister. Every time I walk up or down their driveway, I have to do that...they can hear me coming...lol. Ican’t wait till the first real cool snap comes so we can light up our fireplace. There’s just something so soothing and comforting about watching those glowing embers.

But the most important thing, and what makes me feel giddy, is the fact that we now have three seasons behind us in Seth’s deployment and only one more to go. He will be home at the end of Fall. That’s right...he’ll be home before the Winter season begins...well, if you can call what we get in Texas Winter...hahaha. Needless to say, it has been a really long nine months...I don’t remember my pregnancy with him being this long. But we’re finally down to double digit days till his return...yeehaw!!!

Anyway, so there you have it. I have a huge grin on my face and I feel like dancing a jig, drinking a toast, and partying. Would anyone care to join me??? :)

That's just Rick

2006-08-22T08:01:00.000-07:00

Okay, where do I begin to tell you about Rick, my oldest boy? He is truly one of a kind.

From the time Rick was born, he was an easy-going kind of guy...very laid back...and that hasn't changed much through the years. You can see it in the picture below where he and Kevin are "lazy canoeing" on a lake in Alaska.
Being the first grandchild on both sides of the family, he garnered alot of attention...but he never demanded it. As his brothers came along, he graciously stepped aside as the center of attention and adored both of them...but that's just Rick... :)

He's a quiet, shy guy...which, once again, doesn't make him the center of attention with people...but that gentle, quiet nature makes him a natural with animals. When most people run out of patience, his is just beginning. I've watched him sit quietly for hours waiting for some wild animal to approach him...and it usually will. Somehow, the animal can sense that he's not a threat and will respond to that. However, his slow-moving nature usually has us waiting for him quite a bit, too. This sometimes drives his Dad crazy, but I don't mind it...much...that's just Rick... :)

He's a peacemaker. He's calm, cool, and collected and can see both sides of anything. He thinks things out in a logical, level-headed manner. If there's a disagreement, he can step in and calm everyone down without making anyone mad. The first time this happened, I missed it...but I heard about it from so many others that I just had to smile. There are times that I bounce things off him to see what he thinks, because I know that he'll give me an honest and well-thought-out opinion. He really should be a negotiator...he has a real gift...but that's just Rick... :)

He's also sensitive, soft-hearted, and caring. He'll do anything for anybody, anytime. I remember a time when the boys were young...maybe 12, 9, and 7...when I was trying to clean the house and they kept dirtying it up right behind me and getting in the way. Well, I finally had enough and told them to go outside to play and not come back in until I told them they could. (Don't get the wrong idea, it was nice weather and not a school day...lol.) Anyway, I fussed at them and shut the door behind them. In just a couple of minutes, there was a small knock at the door...it was Rick. He asked if he could come in and help me clean. Oh my gosh, that really melted my heart and still does when I think about it...but that's just Rick... :)

Rick's not much of a huggy-bear, though. For years, since he was about 12, I've had to chase him down to give him a hug. At one time, it was probably the usual "I'm too old to be hugging my Mom." But then, during his highschool days, it became more of a game...he'd grin and sidestep me. Now that he's older, he just kind of smiles, rolls his eyes, and stands still until the hug is over. I actually got to dance with him at Seth's wedding last year. But notice the smile, the rolling eyes, and the look of "is it over yet"...but that's just Rick... :)

He has a wicked sense of humor, but people who don't know him very well don't get to see that. He reserves his true self for those he's close to. When Katie first met Rick, she thought he didn't like her because he wouldn't say much to her. Now, they have become friends and she is amazed at how funny he is.
His sense of humor is so subtle at times, that you can miss it completely, but for those of us who know him best, it can be "in your face"...but that's just Rick... :)

Now, don't get me wrong...Rick may be shy, quiet, sensitive, and caring, but he is all guy. I got the rare opportunity to see him come out of his shell at church one time when the youth were in charge of the service. He and some of the more rowdy bunch very quietly walked back and forth across the balcony, one at a time, where no one but the youth in the pulpit area could see them. I realized something was going on when I noticed one of the youth looking that way. When I turned to see what it was, I saw Rick walk quietly across the balcony. You'd think that I would have been upset, but I couldn't help but laugh...it was Rick coming out of his shell. I loved it and treasured the moment. And when he's with his brothers, oh my gosh, they can get rowdy and rank...even at their ages...but, God help me, I enjoy every minute of it. It's just so wonderful to see them all enjoy each other so much, and it's great to see Rick "be all that he can be."

You may be wondering why I chose today to talk about my first-born son. Well, today is Rick's birthday...and I have a very special message for him...

Happy Birthday, Rick. I'm so glad you came into my life and I got to spend so many years with you...watching you grow into the man you are today. You've brought me more happiness than you'll ever know. I'm so very proud of you and I love you very much.

Alaska - land of the midnight sun

2006-08-13T10:08:00.000-07:00

That's right folks, summertime in Alaska...it only gets dusky at night. When we were there two years ago, we went camping on the Kenai Penninsula. You know those pesky middle-of-the-night trips to the bathroom when you're camping?? Well, let's just say I didn't need a flashlight to find my way..... :)

Anyway, back to this trip. We flew up Friday evening after work. All of Kevin's furniture had been shipped already, so we crashed on air mattresses on his apartment floor. We spent half of Saturday with his truck up on a lift on the base changing the oil, replacing worn shocks, and getting it ready for the long trip. Yes, I got greasy too. What??? You think I'm a girlie girl or something??

We spent Sunday enjoying Alaska one last time. We drove South of Anchorage along Turnigan Arm, the long water inlet between the penninsula and the mainland, to Girdwood.
We hopped on the Alaska Railroad in Girdwood, which is really nothing but a whistle stop for the train, and chugged a few miles into the mountains.
Our destination was Spencer Glacier...you can see it in the background of the picture below. The size of the glacier is a bit deceiving, though. The mouth of the glacier that you see is actually a mile across from one mountain to the other.
At the glacial lake, we loaded on rafts and maneuvered our way through the huge icebergs floating in the lake to the Peace River and rafted down the river. It was absolutely gorgeous floating along between the mountains and bouncing over the rapids...it made us wish we were staying longer in Alaska. But, alas, we had a long roadtrip ahead of us.

Monday morning, we were up and at it early to get everything out of his apartment and loaded onto his truck, then Kevin had to don his uniform one more time to do his final PCSing. Once that was done, we picked up his 4-wheeler and trailer, stopped at the grocery store to stock up on trip munchies, and finally hit the road about 1300. A couple hours later we stopped beside a beautiful glacial creek for a late picnic lunch. The water was that beautiful turquoise color and looked very inviting, but it was also icy cold.

We didn't make it to the Canadian border that day because of our late start. We ended up spending the night in Tok, a little town at one of the two main crossroads in Alaska, where we left Old Glenn Highway and hopped on the Alaska Highway for our trip through Canada. This picture was taken from the balcony of our room in Tok at about midnight. Like I said before, it only gets dusky at night in Alaska.

Day 2 started out great and we were making good time...until we got to the Canadian border. We were in a line of vehicles waiting to be processed, when out walked this Customs woman with a chip on her shoulder...honestly. She picked us out of the line and signaled us aside. Uh oh... She asked for IDs and we knew we were in trouble when she told Kevin that his military ID wasn't sufficient...hmmmmm...me thinks she dislikes the American military. It went downhill from there and she ended up searching the whole truck. She pulled everything out of our suitcases, went through all his boxes, and made us pour out a bottle of Saki that Kevin had brought back from Japan as a souvenir and a small bottle of Captain Morgan rum that I had bought while in Alaska. I think she was pissed that she didn't find any weapons or drugs...and believe me she looked in every wheel well and under the hood and everything. Freaking crazy Canuck!!!

Needless to say, our morning was shot by the time we left, an hour and a half later, but we put a few more miles between us and that border before we stopped for lunch at a beautiful mountain lake. In this picture, Kevin is scanning the surrounding mountains with his binoculars looking for signs of wildlife...you can see part of the lake in the background.
We did find time to celebrate Kevin's birthday later that day, despite the border fiasco, and it was nice to be with him on his birthday for a change, after missing so many while he was in Alaska. Too bad I couldn't bake him a cake..... :)

The rest of our trip through Canada was soured by our encounter at the border...plus we managed to come in contact with some of the rudest people wherever we stopped. One night, we fell into a town rather late and had to hunt everywhere for a motel room. It was almost 2100 before we went looking for a place to eat. The only place in town that was open was a bar and grill that looked like a nice place. We ordered our food and proceeded to wait. The waitress kind of forgot about us, as she was busy visiting with her friends. When our food finally arrived, she told Kevin that his burger had "accidentally" been given away but that they had put another burger on the grill and it would be ready in 5 minutes. Okay, what could we say. Ten minutes later, we were still waiting for his burger when our waitress served a burger exactly like what Kevin had ordered to a guy (one of her friends) at the table next to us who had just come in a few minutes earlier...hmmmm. In another 10 minutes, she finally brought Kevin his burger...and do you know what she said??? She didn't say I'm sorry for the wait or anything apologetic...she said, "Well, better late than never this time of night." Okay, fine...there went her tip.

The lady at the motel where we stayed was a totally different story, however, and restored my faith in people. She was friendly, accommodating, and even gave me a stamp for the postcard I was sending to Seth. Yeah, we sent a postcard to Seth every day. That way he kinda sorta made the trip with us..... :)

Canada is a truly beautiful place and is full of wildlife, not unlike Alaska. One evening, we were driving along, trying to make the next town before it got too late, when we saw a moose in a pond at the side of the road. We came to a screeching halt in the middle of the highway and laughed our asses off as Kevin attempted to back up his trailer. Don't get me wrong, Kevin can back up any trailer, usually, but for some reason, he was getting no cooperation from his trailer that day. I finally just got out of the truck and walked back to where the moose was and took some pictures. He looks further away in this picture than he actually was (he's the small dark spot in the middle of the picture at the back of the pond), but isn't the scenery idyllic??
What was really incredible was that we were stopped in the middle of the highway for at least 10 minutes, and we never saw another vehicle the whole time we were there. It was so quiet that I could hear the water dripping from the plants the moose pulled up out of the pond. Talk about relaxing...I could have stayed there all night.

After being in Canada for four days, however, we were ready to make a run for the border. We drove down through Jasper and Lake Louise, crossed the border, and spent the night in northwestern Montana Friday night. I've got to tell you, it felt really great to be back in the good ol' USA. We spent a very relaxing evening sitting in camp chairs outside our motel room (which was more like a house with a carport), having a few drinks after some tasty barbecue for dinner, and enjoying a cool breeze, green rolling hills, and some beautiful stars as the sun went down. Yeah, it actually got dark that night.....lol. We decided then and there that we would have to go back to Montana some day......but that's another story.

From Montana, we dropped straight south through Idaho and Utah (by the way, driving through Utah is like driving through hell, literally), then drove east through Colorado....that's some beautiful country.
We stopped there long enough for the guys to take a helicopter tour of the Royal Gorge. No, I didn't do it...even though I would have liked to. I tend to get motion sick, and we still had a long drive ahead of us that day, and I didn't want to spend it feeling like crap.
After the helitour, we dropped south into New Mexico to see where Kevin's new base was and spent the night there. Then, the next day, HOME. We made the 4,000-plus-mile drive from Anchorage to Dallas in about 8 and a half days. I think we left a contrail at times..... :)

The best part of the trip was getting to spend so much time with Kevin...hadn't done that in a long, long time...and probably won't get to do it again. Ahhhh, life is good!!!

Before I sign out, I have a message for two very important people who were married one year ago today... "Happy Anniversary, Katie and Seth. I know this has been a tough first year of marriage with the deployment, but you're almost there now and you'll get to celebrate big time in 3 1/2 months. I love you both very much!!!"

Heartbreak

2006-08-07T09:11:00.001-07:00

Sorry, the Alaska trip post will have to wait.....I learned from a friend that one of the guys he served with in Iraq just lost a son over there.....it really broke my heart. This has to be every parent's nightmare, but especially when you've been there/done that yourself. I do so wish there was something more I could do for this soldier's father and his family, other than just send my prayers and concern. If you would, please stop by my friend's blog at In Iraq for 365 and leave your condolences for the family. The least we can do is let them know we care.

Soon.....

2006-07-31T14:20:00.000-07:00

Hello all...I just wanted to tell everyone that I'm still alive and kicking and all is well in our little part of Texas and Iraq. I know I haven't written in a while, but there's been alot going on. First was the Alaska trip, now Kevin's home on leave, I've had lots to catch up on at work, I'm about to leave on another business trip tomorrow, and I've been busy gathering medical info on Ken's accident last year to settle up with the other guy's insurance company.

I promise I'll post again soon to tell you all about our trip and will include pictures. Till then, hope all is well with everyone....you're still on my mind.

Thoughts of Seth

2006-07-07T06:44:00.000-07:00

I don't think I have to tell any of you how often I think about Seth these days...he is constantly on my mind. I get to talk to him on the IM (once a week, if I'm lucky) and occasionally get to see him on the webcam (it's always great to see his face). Talking to him on the phone rarely happens, but when it does, hearing his voice and his laughter is better than anything and lets me know that he's doing okay. Yeah, I worry about his well being, both physical and mental.

Here we are, about to embark on a two-week roadtrip through Alaska and Canada with our middle son, whom I also love dearly (he's my huggy bear). I can't wait till this afternoon when that big jet liner takes off for the Great White North, but part of me hates the thought that I'll be completely out of touch with Seth for those two weeks...no Internet, and no cell phone service till we get back to the lower 48, and then it will be sporadic, at best, through the Rockies. So, I'm excited...yet apprehensive. I know I'll have a great time, but I also know that I'll be thinking about Seth and wondering if he's doing okay the whole time...*sigh*. I can't help it...Mom's are like that.... :)

My dad, being the Marine that he is, has a subscription to Leatherneck magazine. He showed me a couple of poems in the back of the July issue the other day, and one of them spoke to me as no other has. The poem is titled I Have a Son; He's Gone to War by Amanda Lord. Since I'll be away from the computer for a couple of weeks, I thought I'd leave all of you with a few exerpts from that poem...the ones that speak the same language as my heart...

I have a son; he's gone to war,
Location vague, unknown.
It doesn't matter where he is;
I just know he's not home.

My memories are strong and true
But cannot be replaced.
The joy I feel when he is near
Will never be erased.

Sometimes the need to hear his voice
And know that all is well,
My mind can think of nothing else;
I do not mean to dwell.

Unless you have been in my shoes,
This pain I can't convey.
To know he's safe and feels my love -
I worry night and day.

Emotions run both hot and cold,
I feel both pride and fear.

...

My son, I long for your return
To touch your dear, sweet face.
To hear your laugh, look in your eyes,
And feel your strong embrace.

I don't think I have to tell any of you how much I look forward to the day he returns, either...it can't get here soon enough for me.

Love you, baby boy. I'll talk to you in a couple of weeks..... :)

Small world

2006-07-03T08:03:00.000-07:00

I gotta tell ya, after my last business trip, I truly believe that this is a very small world.

Last Tuesday morning, I flew to Fargo, North Dakota on business. I've never been there before and didn't know anyone who lived there, so I was very surprised to find that I had something in common with one of the people there.

The last night we were in town, we had dinner and a movie at the old Fargo Theater. It wasn't a sitdown dinner (it was really heavy appetizers and drinks without tables and chairs), so a few of us filled our plates and headed for the carpeted stairs leading to the balcony. We were talking about the day spent out playing with the the backhoes and skidsteers and other construction equipment. I love driving those things..... :) The site was near the airport, which just happened to be the home of the Happy Hooligans, Fargo's Air National Guard F-16 unit. I could hardly concentrate on what people were saying for the fighters taking off and landing right there. Hooah!!! I love air shows!!

Anyway, in talking about the F-16s, the conversation turned to the Air Force, and of course I mentioned Kevin and that he would be working on F-16s at his new base in New Mexico, and that we were flying up to Alaska this Friday to drive back to the lower 48 with him. One of the people with the company putting on the event said her brother was in the Air Force and was stationed in Alaska, too.....what? I asked her which base and she said Elmendorf.....really?? I asked her what he did and she said he was a jet mechanic.....you're kidding me!!! I asked what kind of plane he worked on and she said a C-something.....a C-130, no way!!!! The C-130 and E-3 Awacs are in the same squadron.....I can't believe it!!!!! What's his name and rank??? I'll ask Kevin if he knows him next time I talk to him.

Well, I asked Kevin about him this weekend, and he does know him!!! As it turns out, her brother is no longer a mechanic, he's an instructor. But every time Kevin has gone to get run certified on his engine (which is every year), her brother was the one who administered the test. Oh my gosh!! Talk about a small world!!! This is crazy...but in a good way..... :)

Hope all of you have a great Fourth of July.....this definitely IS a day to celebrate!!!

And if I don't get a chance to post again before we head for the Great White North, have a wonderful July..... :)

Sadness and rage

2006-06-20T15:58:00.000-07:00

I was trying not to think about it too much, and hadn't intended to post anything about it...until I got an email from a friend about it. He was pissed!!! As I responded to his email this afternoon, I started thinking about it again. I thought about it all the way home from work and knew that I wasn't going to be able to think about anything else until I got it off my chest...so.....

I heard the news this morning...that the two Soldiers who had been missing for three days had been found dead, and that they had been tortured barbarically. My heart sank...and I immediately thought of their families. I felt sick to my stomach thinking about the torture and knew that their families must be hurting something awful. To think that their last moments were spent being tortured...I can't even begin to express my thoughts on that. I started thinking about how I would have felt if it had been Seth and it hurt so bad. I just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry and scream.

But then, the pain passed and I got pissed. I found myself thinking about how badly I want our guys over there to kick some insurgent asses because of this. I want them to find every one of those freaking cowards and put them out of their misery. That's not exactly a "motherly" thought, is it...but it's an honest one.

Who's your daddy??

2006-06-18T11:20:00.000-07:00

My dad, being the first man in my life...and one of the hardest acts for any guy to follow...has always held a special place in my heart. He, of course, is the one responsible for my patriotic feelings; he put the worm on my hook when we went fishing; he picked me up and held me above his head to see over a crowd; he went looking for the snake that almost got me when I was running along the trail in the woods behind our house; he shared his steak with me when my head barely reached over the top of the table; he let me hang out with him and my brothers when they played sports; he taught me that honesty and keeping your word are two of the most important traits a person can have by setting that example for me (he's the most honest person I've ever met); he went "hunting," literally, for someone who tried to hurt me once (all I can say is that guy's lucky the police found him first); he's always been there when I needed someone to talk to; he never judges me or says "I told you so" when I make mistakes (and there have been many of those); he makes me laugh; he's always been my biggest fan; and I could go on and on because there's so much more...but I think you get the picture...I'm a very lucky girl.

Happy Fathers Day, dad...I love you..... :)

Honored and humbled

2006-06-12T20:53:00.000-07:00

When I was in Paris, I got to spend quite a bit of time with my big boss from Illinois - our publisher and company president. Working out of different offices in different states has kept our conversations limited to the phone, emails, and the couple of times a year our paths cross on business trips. He's a family man with 4 sons, ranging in age from 29 to 8. They're all doing well - the oldest one graduated from college and now has a great job; the next oldest is in college; the number 3 son just graduated from high school and has been accepted at a very good college; and the youngest is all about baseball and sports. All great guys!!!

My boss is great, too. He's been especially supportive when it comes to my two military boys. He's always asking about how they're doing, especially Seth. While we were in Paris, every time my boss introduced me to someone he knew, he would tell them about my sons and about Seth being in Iraq. I was a little bit embarrassed by this, but flattered at the same time because he thought so much of my boys when he'd never even met them. But I didn't realize just how much he thought of them until we were sitting at a small cafe one night having a drink before calling it quits for the night.

As we sat there talking, he suddenly got very serious and said, "Your boys are the future of our country." I was a bit taken aback by his comment, but said, "Not any more so than your boys are." His next comment left me speechless. He said if his two oldest sons were asked to serve in the military, they'd probably head for Canada. Then he said that the one just graduating from high school might serve, maybe, if he had to, and that the youngest one probably would, if asked, because he thought he'd done a better job raising him. Then he went on to say that my boys had volunteered to serve, and that they were the kind of people who would keep our country great.

Wow!!! I never expected that and I think I sat there with my mouth hanging open for a minute or two. I couldn't think of anything to say. Shoot, what can you say after something like that?? I can't fully describe my feelings at that moment, but I didn't think it was possible to feel so honored and so humbled at the same time.

Okay, that being said, let me put things into perspective where my boys are concerned. When I told Seth what my boss said about them, he laughed and said, "Yeah, I'm the next George Bush and Kevin is the next Condoleeza Rice." .....Alllllrighty then...there's a reality check for ya..... :)

I've been thinking a lot lately.....

2006-06-09T05:21:00.000-07:00

I know...that can be dangerous...especially where I'm concerned...but, after Memorial Day, I couldn't help but think.

Last year, Memorial Day was very emotional for me. Maybe it was knowing that my son would be deploying later in the year, or maybe it was having a friend who had served in Iraq and lost some friends there. I never really figured out why, but everything made me cry. All the news stories and the specials on TV were poignant and touching...so I was in tears for weeks.

This year, however, was completely different. Other people's lack of remembering what the day was all about really pissed me off. It's not a "holiday" to celebrate, it's a "day of remembrance," and it really made me mad that so many people forgot that...but, I already covered that in my last post so I'll spare you the rant again.

Anyway, I've been thinking a lot lately...about why people can be so far removed from what's going on in Iraq and Afghanistan...about how they can put the sacrifices that so many soldiers have made over the years out of their minds. I've been wondering if I'd be the same way if it weren't for my sons and friend.

Most who read this are connected to the war in some way...either through family or friends or having been there/done that. We have a personal stake in what's going on. But since we have a volunteer military now, there are far more people who don't have that personal connection. So, I began to wonder just how disconnected I'd be under those circumstances. That's one of the reasons I haven't posted in a while...I've been trying to sort things out in my mind. But you know what I discovered?? I'd still feel the same way I do now.

Long before my sons joined the military, we flew the flag in our yard on all the patriotic days like Memorial Day, Flag Day, the 4th of July, Veterans Day, etc. During the Gulf War, I followed the news everyday to see what was going on. After the September 11th attacks, I watched everything I could find about our progress in the fight. And there's just something about men in uniform that has always caught my eye...oh, sorry, I got off the track there a little bit..... :) Anyway, I don't think I've changed at all in the way I feel about our country and our troops. It has however, become more personal now...and I have become much more vocal about my feelings and am always ready to set someone straight. That much has changed. On my latest business trip, I very nicely told someone who felt like we weren’t making any progress in Iraq that the troops who were there were telling a different story. He changed the subject after that...... :)

Once again, I have to credit my dad for rearing us right and for teaching us to be patriots. It’s funny...I sat next to a young man on a flight home this week who was in the Air Force and on his way to San Antonio. He’d just made Staff Sergeant in the spring and was headed to 7-level school at Lackland AFB. After we talked for a while, he said, “You come from a military family, don’t you?” That stopped me dead in my tracks. At first I said, “No, not really,” but then I thought about it for a while. I had always thought of military families as the families of those who are career military for 20 or more years. My dad was in the Marines during WWII, but only for four years and that was long before any of us kids were born or even thought about. My two youngest sons are active-duty military and have both reinlisted, but neither has decided to make a career of it. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it’s not the length of time...it’s the frame of mind. I finally told him that I guessed I was from a military family...and I couldn’t help but smile when I said it.

Remembering

2006-05-27T20:12:00.000-07:00

I was listening to the radio in the car the other day. They were talking about Memorial Day...but all they talked about was how it marked the beginning of summer and all the wonderful sales going on all weekend......what the heck?!?! When did Memorial Day turn into a celebration of the beginning of summer? When did people choose to forget about our fallen troops?? We're in the middle of a war, and still, people forget the true meaning of this day. What has to happen to make people remember??? It's such a small thing. All we need to do is remember them...remember them and honor them...not because they died, but because of who they were and what they did for all of us.

Here's to all of our fallen troops...all heroes...may they rest in peace knowing that they will not be forgotten. Some of us will always remember...always...

Mixed up feelings

2006-05-24T18:54:00.000-07:00

I was trying to tell a friend about my mixed up feelings today...but it's hard to explain them to someone else when you don't completely understand them yourself.

Seth has a relatively safe, but important, job in Iraq that he enjoys, but it keeps him from going out on missions most of the time...which frustrates him to no end. I think most mothers understand how their sons can feel this way. We've all been through their broken bones from jumping off a roof or out of a tree...or the stitches from climbing a chain-link fence with the points sticking up at the top...or the dislocated and broken toes from doing wheelies on a three-wheeler without brakes...yeah, okay, that was all Seth...... :) There's just something about that rush of adrenalin that makes their day. I've always understood that guys need that. But I think most mothers would be thrilled that their son was in a safe place...and I am...but...

That being said...we heard from Seth that he got to go out on a mission this weekend. He sent us alot of pictures that he took while he was out and a picture that was taken of him in his full battle gear. That picture, of course, has been forwarded to my dad, the Marine. Now, maybe it's my upbringing (all those war stories), or maybe it's just the fact that I want my boys to be happy and do what they love to do...but I was absolutely thrilled to hear that he had gotten to go on that mission...and I hope he gets to go on more missions. I know it's dangerous out there, but I also know how badly he wants to go out.

So my question is...does this make sense? I want him to be safe, yet I want him to be able to go out on missions at the same time. Talk about mixed up!! Am I the only one who feels that way???

Okay......Paris

2006-05-17T12:45:00.000-07:00

Last week was a bad week for me. I was on the verge of tears every day and don't know why...just one of those weeks, I guess. Everything eventually came to a head on Friday afternoon when I got a call from Katie. I won't go into details here, but we had a bit of a scare that you can read about on her blog. I would have lost it completely that day if not for a certain friend. He came to the rescue by calming my fears and making me laugh inspite of my tears. Yeah, you know who you are...thanks...... :)

Anyway, after last week, I decided it was time for a much lighter post, so I decided to write about my trip to Paris. Now this isn't going to be your typical post about Paris, not the kind you'd expect anyway. Au contrere, mon amies, I am going to talk about one of my most memorable experiences. Sure, the cobblestone streets were beautiful and the old architecture was grand and the monuments were breathtaking, but there was so much more to it than that...there was the totally unexpected..... :)

We walked our butts off all week, covering miles of convention floor talking to people until the day before we came home. That morning was reserved for sightseeing. We left the hotel early and went in search of a "real" breakfast...not easy to find in Paris. They eat continental-style breakfasts that consist of a tiny cup of espresso and a baggette (pastry). Well, after a week of that, this Texan wanted something more substantial, like eggs and meat. We finally found a little cafe that served real breakfasts, but the cook didn't come in until 0800, so we had to wait 20 minutes. We sat at a table on the sidewalk outside and watched the Parisiens hoofing it to work...and believe me, they hoof it. Even using the transit system involves lots of walking...from metro (subway) stations to train stations with multi-levels of trains going in different directions...and then standing up for a 30 minute train ride to your destination. I know why I didn't see any really obese people over there...the walking keeps the pounds off. I swear, we walked 5 to 10 miles every day. That and the fact that the only snack I ever saw anyone eating was bread. Yeah, all the Frenchies carried a loaf of bread with them. You'd see the loaves in sacks under their arms, sticking out the top of a backpack, hanging out of a purse, in a shopping bag...you get the idea. And people would just tear off a chunk and eat it whenever and wherever they got hungry.

Anyway, back to breakfast. While we sat there watching people rush to work and school, we couldn't help but notice all the trash that had been thrown down along the street...it was really bad...and there were trash containers every 20 feet. Well, street cleaners came along in their bright green suits and started cleaning it all up. They had their little brooms and would turn on water outlets that ran along the street and pretty much washed everything down the drain. They were "allegedly" sweeping up the big stuff into bags, but we watched cigarette packs run down the street into the drains. It made me wonder where all that crap was going. And I do mean crap...dog crap...it was everywhere, too, and was washed away with the trash. Okay, I should explain to you that we didn't stay in the fancy part of town where everything is spotless. We stayed in the Montmartre District not far from the Moulin Rouge...an interesting area with much more colorful characters..... :) Needless to say, we laughed about the street cleaners while we ate our omelettes.

After breakfast, we headed for Notre Dame cathedral...which was very big and very nice, but personally, I liked the Sacre Ceour cathedral better. It was smaller and more personal and had a beautiful painting of Jesus on the back wall. From Notre Dame, we crossed the Seine River and walked past the Louvre, through Tulienaries Park, past this famous fountain in a famous square that I can't remember the name of, past the obelisk, down the Champs Elysees, and on to the Arche de Triomphe. Along the way, we heard siren after siren and wondered what was going on...it seemed so un-Paris-like and more like Chicago. When we got to the Arche de Triomphe, we found out what the sirens were all about. As we approached the monument, we noticed alot of people on top of it holding some kind of huge banner. (Look close and you can see the banner and a few people at the top of this picture.)

My boss commented that it was probably protestors, as France was full of them. We had already encountered a couple of protests earlier in the week. Anyway, when we got to the monument, there were police cars everywhere, as well as paddy wagons, and four policemen were blocking the underground entrance to the monument. We watched for a while, wondering what to do next. We'd walked a long way to get there...miles as a matter of fact...and I wanted to know what was going on. So, I walked up to the four policemen at the entrance and asked if any of them spoke English. To my surprise, this young man got a huge smile on his face and said, "I speak English (huge emphasis on the I)." So I asked him what was going on. He said it was a protest. I said, "I can see that, but what are they protesting?" His answer..."Archaeologies." I stood there looking at him for a minute trying not to laugh out loud and finally asked, "Why are they protesting archaeologies?" He said, "They are protesting that they haven't had work for two years." Okay, that made it really clear...not!! Then, with a huge smile on his face again, he said, "They'll come down in an hour or two so you can come back then." Well, after talking to him for a while longer, I had to have a picture of him and his buddies. When I told him that I wanted to take their picture, he got another huge smile on his face and said something to his buddies in French and they all turned towards me. Then, as I got ready to snap the picture, he said, "Say cheese." What a hoot!!! (The guy I talked to is second from the left in the picture...don't they look like cowboys???)

I'm telling you, that was better than any plain ol' visit to a monument. Thanks to the protestors and the policemen, I had a priceless memory, a great story to tell, and pictures to boot..... :) It doesn't get any better than that!!!

The long and the short of it......

2006-05-11T14:12:00.000-07:00

My mind is all in a twist these days. On one hand, time has been flying by since Seth left for Iraq. I've been extremely busy at work and making all kinds of business trips and have more trips lined up for the summer and into the fall, including one non-business trip to Alaska in July...can't wait for that one. The Paris trip last month was a long ways off once. I spent a month re-learning French from my high school days...and no, it didn't help much..... :) Now the Paris trip is a thing of the past. Then again, Seth came and went on his R&R a couple months ago and it was great having him home for a while. And that seems like forever ago. So, I know that the time has been flying by......

But, if that's the case...why is it still such a long time till Seth redeploys??? Why does he still have more than half of his deployment to go???? I just can't explain how time can go by so fast, yet go so slow at the same time. It's frustrating and it really sucks!!!

Best things first......

2006-05-05T09:36:00.000-07:00

I know I said I'd post about my trip to Paris, and I will, but there's something more important I need to talk about first......

Monday, Katie and I made a trek out to the airport to meet up with one of Seth's buddies. He'd just spent two glorious weeks of R&R with his wife and 1-year-old son and had a layover in Dallas on his return to Iraq. We went out to the airport to buy his lunch and entertain him for the afternoon. Yeah, I took off from work to do it, my boss is the best. We thoroughly enjoyed spending time with him, and he said we were a great distraction for him as he was down about leaving his family again. It wasn't the first time I'd had lunch with a soldier, other than my son, who was on his way back to Iraq, and hopefully, it won't be the last. Casanova was the first one nearly two years ago...... :) Ahhhh, but I digress.

While sitting at the airport waiting for his flight to start boarding, I couldn't help but notice the other soldiers...some were with their families. One soldier had his wife and two children with him. His son was about 3 and his daughter only 1. He followed right behind her as she toddled through a maze near the boarding area. I watched the soldier's face and could see the joy and pain he felt at that moment. How difficult it must be for these soldiers to leave their little ones behind, especially at the age when they are growing up so quickly, learning to walk and talk. I watched as Seth's friend, Gabe, talked to his wife and son on the phone several times while he waited. He tried hard to keep his emotions in check, but they showed on his face and in his eyes. At one point, after he talked to them one last time before boarding, his eyes started to water and he commented that something was making his eyes burn...yeah, something indeed. It was all I could do to keep from crying myself. The whole thing was like deja vu and reminded me of seeing Seth off two months earlier.

As the soldiers lined up to board, the most amazing thing happened...everyone in the terminal near the boarding area started clapping and cheering. The applause was thunderous and so heart-warming and moving. I still get goosebumps and teary-eyed when I think about it. And of course, the USO cart ladies were there with goodies and hugs. They brought smiles to the soldiers' faces as they were leaving.

Right before Gabe boarded, Katie and I gave him a big hug and told him to take care of himself...and to give Seth a hug for us when he got back. He was like, no way am I hugging him......hahaha, guys...... :) As he walked through the gate, he turned with a huge smile and waved to us. Before we got out of the airport, we got a text message from him thanking us for coming out to meet him...that we had helped him alot. Well, needless to say, that made my day......no, it made my week, month, and more.

For those of you who live in an area that has a hub for military R&R comings and goings...if you've never been out to welcome them home or see them off, you're missing something absolutely wonderful. I can't begin to describe the feelings it evokes in me, but my heart is bursting at the seams by the time I walk out the door. I'm so proud of all our military......and so humbled by them. May God bless and watch over them all!!!

Missing in action......

2006-04-30T07:35:00.000-07:00

Before anyone panics, I'm talking about me, not Seth. I've been missing in action for the past week or so, as I went on a business trip to Paris...and no, not Paris, Texas. It was a very interesting trip...and believe me, alot of the cliches about Frenchies are completely true...... :)

I don't really have time to write much right now, as I just got home at about 0100 yesterday morning...long story...and I'm still trying to readjust to Texas time, but I'll catch you up with a post and some pictures from my trip later this week when I get some time.

In the meantime, here's a link to my dil's (daughter-in-law's) blog. Ya'll go say hi to her. She put up a slideshow of Seth and it makes me laugh every time I look at it. Man, I do miss that boy!!

My dad...my hero

2006-04-12T10:57:00.000-07:00

I have quite a few important men in my life...but the very first one was my dad. I've been thinking alot about him lately because I've been reading his book again. What book you might ask?? I'll explain that later. Anyway, I decided to dedicate this post to him. Besides, it's just possible that hearing about my dad might give you a clue as to where I get my undying patriotism and love for the military.

I have to begin by saying that my dad is my hero...always has been and always will be. I grew up listening to his stories about World War II like they were fairy tales. As kids, we would all sit in the floor around his feet and hang on his every word about the many adventures and misadventures he had. He fought the Japanese on faraway Pacific islands that I'm sure you've read about in history books - Bougainville, Guam, and Iwo Jima. He was a proud Marine and, of course, still is. The saying is definitely true...Once a Marine, Always a Marine! Anyway, through his war stories, we came to know the guys he served with and fought beside - the buddies he kept in touch with after the war, the ones he lost touch with, and the ones who never made it back...and there were quite a few of those. Talking about the war was good for dad, but it was also good for us kids. We grew up with a great respect for our flag and our country, and for the troops who defend it. But there was more to it than that. By talking about his buddies, he kept them alive in his memory and brought them to life in ours. What better way to honor someone than to talk about who they were and what they did.

One of dad's friends was a corpsman named "Doc" Love. He treated the jungle rot on dad's feet in the swamps of Bougainville and was the one who rushed Dad onto a hospital ship after he was wounded at Iwo Jima. Dad probably saved Doc's life on the beach during the Guam landing, though. He bandaged a neck wound that Doc received during a mortar barrage when he left their foxhole to answer the call for a corpsman. Doc made it back after the war and he and dad still keep in touch.

Another of dad's buddies was "Red" Jones, a mean, hard-drinking Irishman who picked fights with anybody and everybody and couldn't hold rank because of that. But Dad said he was the best damn machinegunner he ever met, and when the two of them were together, they were unbeatable. When Red was reassigned to another unit before the Iwo Jima campaign, he was in tears as he begged dad to try to get him back in his squad. He said he didn't think dad would make it without him...that they were a team. In a way, he may have been right...dad was wounded at Iwo. Red made it back after the war, but he and dad didn't keep in touch. When dad tried to find him some years later, he found out that he had died in the '50s.

I can't forget Mike Dupnok, the section leader for dad's squad who later became platoon leader when he was promoted to Gunnery Sergeant. Dad said he was quite the Marine and "volunteered" their squad for all kinds of special missions on Guam...by squad, I mean Mike, dad and Red. Mike was awarded the silver star for heroic actions during the Guam campaign. He was just one of dad's many good friends who didn't make it back...he was killed in action on Iwo Jima the same day that dad was wounded.

As my brothers and sisters and I grew up, we encouraged dad to write everything down so it would never be forgotten and so that his grandchildren and great-grandchildren would know about his experiences. It took quite a while, and several computers, but he finally got everything written in book format. My sisters and I have been adding pictures here and there, and as we get each chapter finished, I've begun sending them to the boys to read. I've been trying to get them to read his book for a while, and now that they're older, maybe they will. I'd like them to know more about the man their grandfather is...while he's still around. I know that they'll be as proud of him as I am.

So you see, when I say I'm a military mom/daughter...I'm not kidding. But I come by it honestly...you might say it's in the genes...... :)

Love you, Dad.

Milbloggers.....like a rock

2006-04-01T13:23:00.000-08:00

The Milblog Conference has been much on my mind lately. I've even had dreams about it...hahaha. Alot of the people who will be there are the ones I've been reading the blogs of for some time now. These people, all of you out there, have opened my eyes to so much over the past few years and helped me deal with Seth's deployment. You've been my rock.

The military families at home have written about their ordeals and feelings, the laughter and the pain, the ups and the downs of having a loved one in a place where none of us would choose for them to be. We read each other's posts and find ourselves nodding in agreement, laughing about similar experiences, crying with each other when things get tough or scary, and rejoicing when someone's Soldier or Marine returns home. I look forward to reading each blog to see how they're doing, to see how their Soldiers and Marines are doing, and to see if they need extra prayers or encouragement. It's tough to be deployed, but it's also hard on the ones left behind who don't know what's happening to their loved ones. My dad has been in both places now, and he has decided that war is harder on those left behind. When he fought in WWII, he said he was too busy to worry about what was going on, but now that his grandson is deployed, he sees it from where his wife and parents were when he was off at war. I don't know for sure which is harder, but I do know that all of you military families out there in the milblog world have made it easier for me.

The milbloggers who are actually deployed, or have been deployed, have been my saving grace for almost 2 years now. I know that I can always find the truth about what's really going on by reading their blogs. And most of the time, it's the only place to hear any positive news. I roll with laughter when I read the stories of their escapades...and cry with heartbreak when one of them loses a friend. I don't know how many times I've had to set one of my friends straight about something going on overseas by telling them what so-and-so said on his/her blog. All of you have become so important to me and a large part of my everyday life. So much so that I feel like you're part of my family.

Anyway, I wish I could be there for the conference in 3 weeks, but I will be on a plane heading out on a business trip that day. I'd love to meet those of you who have become such an important part of my life...to give you a hug and tell you in person just how much you've come to mean to me...but I guess I'll just have to send my love and best wishes through the milblogosphere, and with a friend who will be there. As a matter of fact, this friend just told me that he was asked to be on one of the panels. That seems so right to me, because his was the first milblog I ever read. He had me riveted to his site while he was deployed, and after he returned, I continued to read about his struggles with readjusting to life in the States. So, you see, if not for him, I would never have found the rest of you. So thanks, Casanova, for introducing me to the milblog world that has become so important to me.

I'll be thinking about all of you milbloggers during the conference this month and wishing I was there...and I'll be anxious to hear all about it in your blogs. Even though I won't be there physically, I will most certainly be there in spirit..... :)

Complaint update

2006-03-27T20:55:00.000-08:00

I spent an hour or so Thursday afternoon composing a letter of complaint to the post office about the way I was treated on Tuesday. Then, I went searching for an address to send it to...not an easy task. I finally went to the Internet and found a place to e-mail complaints, so that's what I did. The complaint didn't go to the post office in Dallas, though, it went to the main post office...wherever that is. The site promised an answer in 1-2 days, but I wasn't holding my breath. Honestly, I didn't expect to get anything except your basic form-letter response.

Imagine my surprise when, good to their word, Saturday evening I found a reply e-mail from the post office thanking me for contacting them. They acknowledged my complaint, and said that they had forwarded it to the local post office where the incident occurred. Once again, they promised a response within 1-2 days, this time from the local post office.

Sure enough, today I received a call from a woman at the local post office asking me about my complaint and going over a few of the details. I think she was the station manager. She was very pleasant, apologized profusely, promised me it would never happen again, and said she would take it up with the woman who had been so rude to me.

All I can say is...WOW!! I never expected my complaint to go anywhere. I figured it would fall on deaf ears, but I'm happy to say that I was wrong. Needless to say, it was a pleasant surprise. Sure, it probably won't make a difference in that woman's attitude, but I'm not sure anything could. As for me, a simple apology goes a long way.

Some people......

2006-03-22T10:15:00.000-08:00

Sorry, but I need to VENT!!! I went to the post office yesterday right after work to mail three packages that Katie was sending to Seth. I got there as quickly as I could...it was about 4:45 when I got in line. There were about 6 people in front of me, but only 1 person at the counter. That's okay, I made it there before they closed, and I didn't care how long it took. I was in a good mood and happy to be sending him packages. I had a 4th package that wasn't quite full, so I decided not to send that one until today...I just baked more brownies last night...you hear that, Seth? :)

Anyway, I stood there patiently as each of the people in front of me took at least 5 minutes apiece to take care of their business. Finally, a second person shuffled up to the counter (and I do mean she took her sweet time getting there) and the line began to move a bit faster. I finally got to the counter at about 5:05 (a very nice man behind me in line helped me carry my boxes, too). Well, the woman behind the counter proceeded to admonish me for waiting so late in the day to mail my packages. She said that they closed at 5 and wanted to get the last few customers taken care of as quickly as possible and that packages were very time consuming, especially when they involved customs forms. Now, Katie had already filled out the customs forms and everything was addressed properly and ready to go. All she had to do was weigh each one and attach the postage and customs form. I must have been in too good a mood, because I found myself apologizing to this woman about not being able to get there earlier, that I had to work till 4:30. But the more she said, the more my mood changed. I never said anything to her, but as I walked out the door afterwards, I got pissed. She had alot of nerve complaining about having to spend an extra 5 minutes processing packages to go to a soldier overseas in a war zone. Talk about insensitive and arrogant!! I didn't complain to her about being kept waiting so long.

Well, by the time I got home, I had decided that I was going to write a letter of complaint to the post office and send copies to the local news stations and papers (like that's gonna do any good). But it will make me feel better and maybe, just maybe, somebody will care. If nothing else, maybe she'll get her hand slapped and she won't do that to someone else (yeah, right).

But you know what's really gonna make me feel good?? I'm taking another box to that same post office this afternoon...and I hope I get that same woman...as a matter of fact, I may make sure I get that same woman. Go ahead, punk...make my day...... :)

My flyboy

2006-03-15T06:36:00.000-08:00

Most of the posts I've written have dealt with Seth's deployment, as that occupies alot of my thoughts. Perfectly normal under the circumstances. After all, that's why I started this blog. But I have two other sons who make me very proud and I certainly haven't forgotten about them. Today I'm going to tell you a little bit about my flyboy.

Kevin, my middle son, joined the Air Force when he was just 18, practically right out of high school. It had been his dream for years...and I do mean years (see the picture below)...to become a jet engine mechanic...enough of a dream that after speaking with an Air Force recruiter during his junior year, he suddenly became an honor role student. I can't help but smile when I think about that. You see, he wasn't the best student in school, but once he found his direction he came alive.

Sending him off to basic training was one of the hardest things I ever did. He was just 18 and was the first son to leave the nest. The night he left, I cried the whole time I was cooking dinner. That was 8 years ago this month...my how time flies.

After completing basic and tech school, he was stationed at Barksdale AFB in Shreveport, Louisiana. He was disappointed that he didn't get stationed in some interesting, faroff place; I was thrilled that he was only 3 hours away...... :) He was assigned to the flight line and worked on B-52s. He learned his job well and earned the reputation of being a hard worker who knew his stuff and could be counted on to get the job done. He helped launch the planes that went over to Afghanistan right after the 9/11 attack...and desperately wished he was going with them. But, that's the life of a jet troop, as they are called, you keep the engines running and the planes flying, but you don't usually go with them.

Kevin spent 5 years at Barksdale. During that time, he went on a hot shot run to fix one of their planes that broke down in the Azores, a small group of islands off the coast of Portugal. What was really unusual about that trip was that he flew over on a B-52 that was headed to the war, and flew back on the one he repaired. Not many B-52 mechanics get to fly on the planes they work on. He also went TDY (temporary deployment) to Guam for 10 days, but flew on a commercial airline that time. While on Guam, he visited the World War II museum that pays homage to the Marines who landed there in 1944 to take the island back from the Japanese. He brought some books and stuff back to his Grampa (my dad), who was one of the Marines who made that landing nearly 60 years earlier. That was so cool!!!

Kevin finally got his chance to be stationed some place interesting 2 1/2 years ago. They needed a jet troop at Elmendorf AFB in Anchorage, Alaska. Hot dog!!! He jumped all over that one. Alaska is truly the last frontier and he has loved his time there. He started out in a back shop working on F-15 components, but moved out to the flight line as soon as there was an opening. That's where his heart is. The move changed him to AWACS planes. This gave him the opportunity to travel on the plane when they went TDY to other locations. As a matter of fact, he just returned from a 1-month TDY to Japan and Thailand. This picture was taken at Korat Air Base in Thailand while the maintenance crew was waiting for the flight crew to show up to fly them home. I call it...Kevin in his engine. Appropriate, don't you think???

This summer, when his 3-year Alaska tour is up, he's moving to Cannon AFB in New Mexico. He'll be working on fighters again, F-16s this time, and will start in the back shop. But if I know him, it won't be long before he starts looking towards that flight line again. He loves being out where the action is. I'm not upset about the move, and neither is he. I think he's looking forward to being a bit closer to home for a while, and I like that idea, too. Plus, his dad and I are going to fly up and drive the Alcan Highway with him when he comes back to the lower 48. Yep, there will be a post and pictures about that.

Anyway, ya'll keep your fingers crossed for Kevin...he tests for Tech Sergeant tomorrow. For those of you who don't know, it really is a test, and a hard one at that. So say a little prayer that he does well...I will. Good luck, huggy bear. I love you...... :)

The homecoming......and going

2006-03-09T10:06:00.000-08:00

The homecoming
We went to Terminal D, the new international terminal at the airport, to get Seth on Monday, February 20th. That's where all the overseas flights land now, which is really a shame since they just built that nice new USO in Terminal B. But, the guys coming in aren't usually at the airport very long...just long enough to be picked up by their families or make connecting flights.

I'm sure all of you have heard about the Maine Troop Greeters... they've been mentioned in the papers and on the Internet. They greeted Seth's group on their way to Iraq with food and phones to call home. But, I bet not many of you have heard about the group that greets troops at DFW Airport...so let me tell you about them.

Being our first time to meet a soldier, we wandered into the terminal not knowing what to expect, what gate to go to, or anything. A very nice woman at the information booth asked if we were there to meet a soldier. When we said yes, she proceeded to give us a free parking pass for the day, flag pins, and all kinds of information about his arrival and when he would have to return. We ended up knowing more than Seth did..... :) As we waited, more and more people of all ages started gathering.....young Girl Scouts with boxes of cookies to hand out to the soldiers, a group of people from AT&T, a man with two young sons who carried flags and signs saying thank you, a group of teenagers, and assorted families and individuals. There must have been at least 50 or 60 people there, but most of them weren't meeting a particular soldier, they were just there to say thank you and welcome them home. How heartwarming!!!

As the time neared for the plane's arrival, we were moved to the front of a chute outside the doors leading from the international gate. Families of soldiers were first in line, followed by all the others. By the time the troops started trickling out, a gauntlet of people had formed. The soldiers and marines had to funnel through an ever-narrowing mass of people wanting to pat them on the back and shake their hands, and the whistles, yells, and applause were thunderous. What a rush!!!

Seth was attacked by Katie as soon as he walked through the door, followed closely by hugs from me and his dad. We stood for a while at the front of the line, until Seth had been hugged enough and said he was ready to get out of there. However, he had yet to run the gauntlet. Not only did the greeters want to shake his hand and thank him, they thanked us, too. I've never felt so humbled and so wonderful at the same time. What wonderful people they are to take time out of their busy day to greet our returning troops. I still get teary-eyed when I think about it. God bless all of them!!!

Going
When Seth left yesterday, it was totally different. He left from Terminal B, where the USO is...but that's only for another week, then the troops will start leaving from Terminal D. I think it's pretty sad to take them away from the terminal where the USO is located, though. Let me tell you a little bit about the USO at DFW.

Someone from the USO greets each one of the troops as they arrive and gives them a place to store their bags until they manifest...which always seems to be at 1500. They tell them exactly what to expect, when things will happen, what the families need to do to go inside the secure area to wait with their soldier......and if you don't ask, they track you down and tell you. Then, after a very loud Sgt gives everyone instructions, checks their bags, and gives them boarding passes, the soldiers are free until boarding time. While waiting for their flight, the USO is there to help any way they can...provide a place to sit and hangout, let you call home, provide a snack or a drink, and just do whatever they can to make you feel at home.

We ate at Fridays (sound familiar, Casanova?) and then wandered down to the departure gate to sit and talk. After a while, two older ladies with carts full of snacks and other stuff tracked down each and every soldier in the terminal, no matter where they were, to see if they wanted anything. Not just for the troops, but for their families, too. The carts were full of goodies...donuts, jerky, gum, candy, you name it they had it, as well as toothbrushes and razors...and each soldier was told to take as much as he/she wanted of anything. Seth grabbed a handful of jerky and a package of donuts and proceeded to munch. Later, as each soldier loaded onto the plane, they were handed an extra-large ziplock bag full of stuff, including a calling card to call home. And both cart ladies hugged or patted each and every soldier on the arm or back and thanked him/her as they boarded the plane.

Ken, Katie, and I stood and watched until the last soldier boarded and then just kind of looked at each other. As we stood there, the cart ladies made their way over to us and proceeded to say how proud they were of each of the soldiers. Then they thanked us and asked about our soldier. They gave us each a hug, at which time I almost lost it, and we asked about their "jobs". They said they were volunteers, and that no amount of money could compare to the reward they get when they see the smiles of the soldiers and get to send them off with a hug and a wave. Man, it doesn't get any better than that. God bless our USO and all the wonderful volunteers!!!

Home

2006-02-24T14:02:00.000-08:00

There's alot more to that little four-letter word than meets the eye... warmth, love, comfort, family... but there's only one thing I need to know about it... Seth is there... home. This was Seth's first welcome-home hug from Katie, but there have been, and will be, many more...... :)

Counting the minutes

2006-02-20T05:52:00.000-08:00

The day has finally arrived.....we're about to leave for the airport to pick Seth up. He arrives at 0930. Yep, we'll be hugging that boy soon. I bet you can see the smile on my face..... :) Katie's doing some last minute primping to look her best for her honey, like she really needs to...teehee...and we're watching the clock. AND WATCHING!! AND WATCHING!!! Just how slow can that clock move???

A weak moment

2006-02-13T19:44:00.000-08:00

I was talking to Seth on the IM today and happened to mention that he would be home in a week. I said......”Wow, that sounds good, doesn’t it?” He agreed, of course, but after I said that, I started to tear up. I don’t know what happened. It was totally unexpected and happened at work, of all places. It’s kind of hard to explain to the mailman or the UPS guy why I have tears in my eyes. It's not the first time it's happened, though...and I'm sure it won’t be the last. But, you know what? I don’t care. We’re only a few months into this deployment, and it’s just going to happen sometimes, that's all there is to it. I try to be strong, but I have weak moments......but that's okay.

Happy Valentines Day, boys......I love you all!!!

I miss this face!!!

2006-02-08T15:44:00.000-08:00

This is a picture of the last time I planted a kiss on that face.... the night he deployed. I miss this face!!! But guess what?? I'll get to plant another kiss on that face in a few weeks. That's right.... R&R.... two whole weeks of leave. Am I excited??? Duh!!! I'm counting the days. We all are. As a matter of fact, Katie has numbers counting down to the day he arrives on her door. Every morning she tears off another number. So, yeah, we're just a wee bit excited.... I can't hardly wait...... :)

Where am I going?

2006-01-27T08:20:00.000-08:00

Walking into the office building this morning, I came across a man and a woman standing in front of the list of occupants, looking rather puzzled. I waited for the elevator, watching them out of the corner of my eye. As I was getting onto the elevator, I paused in the doorway and turned back to them and asked if I could help them find the office they were looking for. They looked at each other with a look of relief and said they were looking for a particular doctor. I told them that they needed the building next door and the look in their eyes as the woman said “I told you we were in the wrong building” to the man was priceless. They smiled and thanked me and I stepped into the elevator and pushed the button for my floor. I couldn’t help but smile and chuckle as I rode up to my floor...but it also made me think. Is that the way I look these days? Like I’m lost in a fog? Like I have no idea where I'm going or what’s going to happen next? When will life get back to normal again, or will it ever? These thoughts made me frown and wonder...but then, they made me smile.

My life has changed so much in the last few years...but I honestly wouldn’t want to go back to where I was before. I’ve grown so much since then, but I’ve shrunk too...figure that one out... :) I watched my family spread out across the world to where I now have no sons at home and two of them are on opposite ends of the earth...miss all three of you guys. My husband and I have grown closer than ever...love you, baby. We had the house to ourselves for a couple of months after 20 something years and then it filled up again, with a daughter this time...something I never expected but am enjoying to no end...glad you’re here, Katie. I made some great new friends, and one has turned out to be a Godsend for me, even though he doesn’t see it or understand it...do you, Casanova.

So, I guess it’s not all that bad not knowing where I’m going or what’s going to happen next, as long as I have my family and friends. Every time I’ve felt lost, someone has been there to help me find the way...love you, Dad. With every dark cloud, there has been a silver lining...thanks, Gabe. With every stumble along the way, there’s been someone there to pick me up...sisters are the best. With every prayer I’ve been unable to utter due to an inability to focus lately, there has been someone praying on my behalf...love you, Andy and Sondra. I feel so genuinely loved and cared about and rich beyond all earthly means......may God bless all of you.

We want you to know.....

2006-01-24T18:17:00.000-08:00

Back in 1999, when my nephew's girlfriend was only 15 years old, she wrote a poem for her uncle who was about to deploy to Kosovo. She'd misplaced it over the years of moving with her family, but found it again last night when she was going through some of her things. She immediately thought of Seth......so she sent it to me tonight. I read through it with tears in my eyes and immediately called her to ask permission to post it here. I hope you like it as much as I do.

For all of the sons and daughters
For all of the mothers and fathers
For all of the brothers and sisters
Who are far away
We know that we will see your shining faces again some day.

For all of the prayers and wishes
For all of the missed hugs and kisses
For all of the sleepless nights and tears that we have cried
We want you to know that
In our hearts, you'll never die.

For all of the pain that you will go through
For all of the good that you will do
For all of the fighting people who know you
We want you to know that
We will always love you.

For all of the things that you'll fear
For all of your falling tears
For all of the days that will seem like years
We want you to know that
When you come back, we will still be here.

by Robyn Sewell

Life as usual???

2006-01-19T12:25:00.000-08:00

I’ve read it so many times in the blogs of those who are deployed...they say, "Life goes on as usual back home while we’re over here.” Well, maybe life goes on as usual for those who don’t have someone in their family deployed, but life sure doesn’t go on as usual for those of us who have someone over there.

I sometimes feel like I’m just going through the motions every day. I go to work, eat lunch in the usual places, make the drive home listening to my favorite radio station, go through the mail when I get home and pay the bills (ugh), talk to Ken about stuff, figure out what’s for dinner, watch our favorite TV shows, play volleyball once a week, do the shopping, talk to friends, and so on and so on and so on. I guess that’s life as usual, but......

While at work, I try to concentrate on what I need to do each day, but I’m constantly monitoring the IM to see if Seth or any of his buddies get on. I find that I fall behind easily these days and have to play catch up because of my lack of focus. The drive home has become a challenge because sometimes a song comes on that makes me think about Seth and I get all teary-eyed and want to pull over and just let it all go......but I don’t. When I get home, I immediately boot up the IM and cringe whenever I have to leave the house to go somewhere because I’ll be away from the computer...my lifeline to Seth. We still do our usual Mexicali’s night – meet Rick at our favorite Mexican food place once a week – but we leave later than usual in case Seth gets on the IM. Even watching TV has changed. I don’t think I’ve watched an entire show since he left. I can’t stay off the computer that long. Hmmmmm......do you detect a pattern here??

But, then......there are nights like last night. Seth got on the IM about 2230. I called the other boys to tell them he was on and we set up a conference with Kevin in Alaska and Rick at his place. I laughed so hard at the boys as they called each other names and sent goofy smiley faces back and forth. It was absolutely fantastic!!! God knows I live for days like that...... :)

So...NO...life does NOT go on as usual back home......at least not for some of us.

Leaving civilization

2006-01-13T11:03:00.000-08:00

Ken and I are headed to the country this afternoon to spend the weekend. Ken's mom has this 50-acre place about an hour out of town that takes us away from the big-city life in a most refreshing way. While we're there, we escape from the norm. We feed the cattle, mend fences, repair the barn, work on the equipment, chop mesquite trees, burn brush piles (except now there's a burn ban all over Texas), and we truly love every minute of it.....but, it also takes us away from the computer. It's hard!!! It's sooooo hard!!!! Hard to leave behind the IM where we can talk to Seth and sometimes see his face, hard to be out of the loop, and oh so hard not to constantly wonder where he is and what he's doing. I knew it would have to happen sooner or later, that I'd have to get on with life, but I've put it off for several weeks. I know it will be good for all of us, but that doesn't make it any easier. I'll still be thinking about him and praying for him, though......and for his buddies......no matter where I am.

By the way, see the flagpole in the front yard? The three boys gave that to their grandmother for Christmas three years ago and planted it in the ground Christmas day. That was the last time all three boys were home together for Christmas.

Broken silence

2006-01-09T15:45:00.000-08:00

We finally heard from Seth this weekend, after about two and a half days of silence. It was, indeed, a blackout...that roadside bomb on Thursday killed some soldiers from his FOB. My heart aches so much for those soldiers and their families. They have been constantly in my thoughts and prayers.

Yeay, he got the laptop, but was fussing at us because we didn't pack the power cord...how did that happen?? I think everything but the kitchen sink was in that box...computer camera, x-box games and controllers, pictures, all kinds of stuff. I can't imagine how the cord got left out and don't know where it is...must be in Katie's room somewhere. Luckily, someone else had an extra cord for him to use until we can get his to him. Oh well, we were going to send another package this week anyway...... :)

Blackout......???

2006-01-06T07:50:00.000-08:00

I think we're having our first communications blackout...only a month into his deployment. I've heard others talk about them, and know what to expect, but......yeah, it's tough. We haven't heard from him in two days. The hardest thing for me is not knowing. I heard about the incidents on Thursday...the roadside bombs that killed some soldiers in Baghdad...but I don't know who...and not hearing from him is gut-wrenching. I understand why they stop all communications, but it doesn't make it any easier for those of us who are waiting to hear something.

I admit it, we've been spoiled. We've been able to talk to either Seth or one of his buddies on the IM every day since he arrived in Iraq. My dad is still in awe of that. We don't talk for very long, maybe 20 or 30 minutes, but it's long enough to know that he's okay, and that's all that matters. Katie was literally bouncing after the last time...go figure. But, there's something heartwarming about having one of his friends tell me, "Seth's doing fine"...and then later, end the conversation with, "take care, Mrs. ------." Imagine that, a soldier deployed in a war zone telling me to take care. Yeah, that's the kind of brothers he's with right now. God, I love 'em all!!!

But in this case, as crazy as it makes me not to hear anything, I guess no news is good news.

Christmas in Iraq

2006-01-04T21:16:00.000-08:00

We got a thumbs up from Seth today. His first packages arrived safely....so it was Christmas in Iraq today. I sent him his Christmas stocking filled to overflowing with goodies and presents....yeah, okay, I'm a diehard mom who sends the boys their stockings no matter how old they get and no matter where they are....so shoot me. Kevin's stocking has traveled to Alaska three times now and then returned empty the next summer when he came home on leave. Seth's stocking went to Korea a couple years ago and came home with him after his one-year tour was over. Now, it's in Iraq and will come home for refilling before next Christmas, or even better, come home with Seth before next Christmas....I hope, I hope, I hope. Maybe I should start adding things to the stockings to represent where they've been....they could be real collectors items some day....well, at least they will be for our family.

The roller coaster ride begins...

2006-01-01T08:21:00.001-08:00

I heard about it last night, a U.S. Soldier in Baghdad was killed by an IED on Friday. No, Seth didn't know him, he was in a different unit and a different brigade, but my heart aches so much for that soldier and his family. He was someone's Seth...someone's son, possibly a brother, maybe someone's husband or sweetheart, or a father. My heart breaks every time I hear about another soldier being killed, and this was really close to my baby boy. I've tried to put the thought of what could happen to Seth out of my mind, and it works most of the time, but this brought it back to the forefront.

And the roller coaster ride begins......in earnest......

Leaving the apartment

2005-12-28T19:36:00.000-08:00

Katie and I spent Monday and Tuesday at Fort Hood, emptying and cleaning the apartment she and Seth had shared for such a short time. I know she had mixed feelings about leaving the apartment behind. She said being back there was weird, she couldn't help but feel that she would look up to see him walk through the door at any moment. That was where she and Seth had started their lives together...where they had laughed and cried and loved. It was full of wonderful memories...but, the one thing that made the apartment so special to her was already gone. So, in the end, we left behind a mere shell where they had lived for a while, and she moved on to a year of living with her in-laws (us) and waiting...for phone calls, letters, IMs, and emails. Yes, it will be a long year, but their love for each other is so strong that it will see them through this separation...I have no doubt about that.

A great day!!

2005-12-25T20:36:00.000-08:00

This has been a great day!! True, Seth and Kevin were not able to be home for Christmas, but we had the next best thing. Seth hailed on the IM about 1000 this morning and we put him on conference with everyone, including Kevin in Alaska. It was great!! When Seth had to sign off, we continued on the IM with Kevin and turned on our cameras. We spent hours on the computer while we opened presents, showed him the pets and the fireplace, and made faces back and forth. Kevin rubbed in the fact that he had a white Christmas by showing us all the snow in his parking lot....he's such a punk..... :) What a great day!!!

Technology is a wonderful thing. If you have any doubts about that, talk to someone who fought during WWII. My Dad never ceases to be amazed at how we can talk to Seth on the computer or the phone....the sole form of communication back during his war was to write a letter, and it was sometimes months between those. We are so spoiled nowadays that people complain when they don't hear from their soldiers for a week. Yep, things have certainly changed.

One thing you can be sure of, though, a laptop and camera will be on their way to Seth before too long so we'll be able to do the same thing with him that we did with Kevin. Right now, though, he's still getting settled into his new home in Iraq...he just moved north a few days ago. Soon, Seth, very soon we'll be able to see that mug of yours.....then it will be Christmas all over again..... :)

Happy Birthday!!! Merry Christmas!!!

2005-12-24T22:12:00.000-08:00

In all the hubbub of the season...shopping, wrapping, parties, traveling, etc...and in dealing with the emotions of Seth's deployment and Kevin's not being home for Christmas...again...I almost lost sight of the real reason for Christmas. I don't ever want to forget that...as it is my faith that gets me through the tough times, and I'll be needing that more than ever in the days to come. So, I'll take this opportunity to say happy birthday to that little baby who was born in the manger so very long ago and who changed the lives of so many people, including mine. Merry Christmas everyone and may God bless you all!!!

Home for Christmas

2005-12-21T07:21:00.000-08:00

One Christmas, some 15 to 20 years ago, I made each one of the boys a "raggedy" soldier and put them in their stockings. They were treasured for a while and sat around on their beds for a few years. Then, as the boys got older, the soldiers got tucked away with the stuffed animals and eventually disappeared into storage boxes and bags. When we were clearing out Rick's room this fall, I found his soldier up on a shelf. I couldn't help but smile as I picked him up and gently wiped the dust from his uniform. When I made those soldiers, I never imagined that two of my boys would actually be wearing that uniform one day. I sat him on the dresser for a few weeks, and when we put up the Christmas tree, it just seemed appropriate to put him underneath it. But, one just wasn't enough, I have two boys missing. So I went into the boys room, also known as the black hole...the room that Seth and Kevin shared...and dug around in one of the storage bags full of stuffed animals until I found another soldier. I put him next to his brother-in-arms beneath the tree where they tirelessly guard the presents. One should actually be in ACUs and desert boots instead of BDUs, and the other shouldn't be wearing a beret (neither should have a camo beret), but that's not what's important. The presence of these two raggedy soldiers under my tree makes me smile and think of Kevin and Seth...that's the important thing. And in a way, it brings them both home for Christmas.

Military families

2005-12-18T22:05:00.000-08:00

I had a recent comment from someone who said she was "in awe of all the wonderful military families." It was really sweet, but it made me stop and think. Are we really different from other families?

Most of the time, I think we're like any other family. We struggle with everyday problems, fight the battle of the finances, and take care of one another. We worry about each other when we're traveling (be sure to call when you get there), and get together whenever we can.

But then again, military families might be different in some ways. To put it in a Jeff Foxworthy kind of way.....

You might be in a military family...

...if you fly the "colors" all the time, not just on the 4th of July.

...if you surprise a Soldier at the airport when you understand the military jargon and acronyms he uses.

...if you talk back to the TV when reporters only have negative things to say about what's going on in Iraq.

...if you get frustrated with friends who don't take the time to dig into the blog sites of deployed soldiers to find out what's really happening.

...if you don't go anywhere without your cell phone so you don't miss that call that might come in from the other side of the world at any time, night or day....yeah, you even take it to the bathroom with you and sleep with it.

...if you keep the Instant Messenger active on the computer, even at work, just in case.

...if you spend as much on shipping as you do on the present at Christmas or on birthdays or any other holiday and in between. And you have to have your shopping finished a week or two before Christmas, depending on where the package is going....no last minute shopping on Christmas Eve.

...if you spend Christmas morning with a phone in your ear while you open presents, so your son who hasn't been home for Christmas since 2002 can "be there."

Well, I'm sure you get the idea by now, and I'm sure there are many other things that could be listed here....so, if you'd like to add to the list, feel free, I'd love to hear from you..... :)

Always remember

2005-12-14T21:35:00.002-08:00

I know alot of you have probably seen this on other blogs and in e-mails, but I had to post it here because it means so much to me.

You see, the day after Seth deployed, I sent e-mails to a few friends with pictures from that night. A volleyball friend replied to my e-mail with this poem. I read it aloud to my husband and Katie as we were decorating the Christmas tree, and had trouble getting through it. I got choked up and teary-eyed several times, as it really hit home. Since then, I've seen it in several places on the Internet, but it gets to me every time.

There are so many service men and women out there spread all over the world, who won't be able to be home for Christmas this year. Two of them are mine, so I know how difficult it is for them and for their families. Please don't forget about all of our Soldiers, Airmen, Marines, and sailors this Christmas......say an extra prayer for them, and for their loved ones.

A Soldier's Christmas
by Michael Marks

The embers glowed softly, and in their dim light,
I gazed round the room and I cherished the sight.
My wife was asleep, her head on my chest,
My daughter beside me, angelic in rest.

Outside the snow fell, a blanket of white,
Transforming the yard to a winter delight.
The sparkling lights in the tree I believe,
Completed the magic that was Christmas Eve.

My eyelids were heavy, my breathing was deep,
Secure and surrounded by love I would sleep.
In perfect contentment, or so it would seem,
I slumbered, perhaps I started to dream.

The sound wasn't loud, and it wasn't too near,
But I opened my eyes when it tickled my ear.
Perhaps just a cough, I didn't quite know,
Then the sure sound of footsteps outside in the snow.

My soul gave a tremble, I struggled to hear,
And I crept to the door just to see who was near.
Standing out in the cold and the dark of the night,
A lone figure stood, his face weary and tight.

A soldier, I puzzled, some twenty years old,
Perhaps a Marine, huddled there in the cold.
Alone in the dark, he looked up and smiled,
Standing watch over me, and my wife and my child.

"What are you doing?" I asked without fear,
"Come in this moment, it's freezing out here!
Put down your pack, brush the snow from your sleeve,
You should be at home on a cold Christmas Eve!"

For barely a moment I saw his eyes shift,
Away from the cold and the snow blown in drifts..
To the window that danced with a warm fire's light.
Then he sighed and he said "Its really all right,
I'm out here by choice. I'm here every night.
Sleep without fear as you turn out your lights."

"It's my duty to stand at the front of the line
That separates you from the darkest of times.
No one had to ask or beg or implore me,
I'm proud to stand here like my fathers before me.
My Gramps died at 'Pearl' on a day in December,"
Then he sighed, "That's a Christmas Gram always remembers.
My dad stood his watch in the jungles of 'Nam',
And now it is my turn, and so, here I am.
I've not seen my own son in more than a while,
But my wife sends me pictures, he's sure got her smile.

Then he bent and he carefully pulled from his bag,
The red, white and blue... an American flag.
"I can live through the cold and the being alone,
Away from my family, my house and my home.
I can stand at my post through the rain and the sleet,
I can sleep in a foxhole with little to eat.
I can carry the weight of killing another,
Or lay down my life with my sister and brother
Who stand at the front against any and all,
To ensure for all time that this flag will not fall.
So go back inside," he said, "harbor no fright,
Your family is waiting and I'll be all right."

"But isn't there something I can do, at the least,
Give you money," I asked, "or prepare you a feast?
It seems all too little for all that you've done,
For being away from your wife and your son."

Then his eye welled a tear that held no regret,
"Just tell us you love us, and never forget
To fight for our rights back at home while we're gone,
To stand your own watch, no matter how long.
For when we come home, either standing or dead,
To know you remember we fought and we bled
Is payment enough, and with that we will trust
That we mattered to you as you mattered to us.

Contact

2005-12-12T19:38:00.000-08:00

Today started out like any other Monday, but while I was on my way to work this morning, Katie called. She said Seth was on the instant messenger and would only be on for another 30 minutes. We hadn’t heard from him since last Tuesday night when he was in Germany, so I was anxious to talk to him. Geez, I was 15 minutes from a computer in any direction. I proceeded to break at least half a dozen speed limits getting to the office...I’m glad there weren’t any cops watching...and ran from the parking garage across the street to my office building.

By the time I got the computer booted up at work and got myself signed on to Yahoo IM, not only was Seth on, but so was my son in Alaska. It was wonderful. We didn’t have much time to talk...Kevin was about to leave for his shift at the base and Seth had to sign off after about 15 minutes...but it was oh so wonderful getting to talk to both of my military boys at the same time. After they signed off, I just sat there staring at the computer with tears running down my cheeks. How do I describe the feeling?? Heartache and total joy, all at the same time. What a great way to start the day!!! :)

One more pic

2005-12-11T20:28:00.000-08:00

Just thought I'd post one more picture from last Monday night, it's one of my favorites. There's nothing quite like standing next to your grown-up son, having to look up to see his face, and seeing that smile....and he's not even the tallest one out of the bunch. Hey, no short jokes, please..... :)

Sisters

2005-12-10T18:44:00.000-08:00

Anytime I'm feeling a bit down, my sisters have a way of cheering me up.

We had a sisters day today. A sisters day can sometimes be running errands, sometimes it's shopping, and sometimes it's a different kind of mission, but it always includes lunch, a margarita (for the little sister and occasionally for me, if I'm not driving), and lots of laughs.

Well, today we went Christmas shopping....go figure. I'm running way behind on that because of the events of the last couple of weeks...the only shopping I had done was to get Seth an MP3 player before he deployed. So, trying to get out of my funk and kick myself into gear, we set out mid-morning and stayed out till after dark. The traffic was terrible around the mall this evening, so I jumped into the opposite lane in the parking lot drive to go around a bunch of people and jump into another parking area (there weren't any cars coming at the time). I caught hell the rest of the night for "driving English". Hey, I got us there without any problems and a heckuvalot quicker than if I'd stayed in that line. Besides, what would a sisters day be without me doing something stupid for the sisters to tease me about..... :)

Anyway, I only bought 3 little things, which doesn't even make a dent in the shopping I need to do, but I had a great day and am still smiling. It was just what I needed. Sisters are great!